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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Unproduced Screenplay Discussion    Horror Scripts  ›  The People Outside Moderators: bert
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Don
Posted: September 22nd, 2019, 9:07am Report to Moderator
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So, what are you writing?

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The People Outside by Steve Fauquier - Horror - A family barricaded in their home tries to survive with dwindling supplies as what's left of humanity threatens to break in. 151 pages - pdf format

Writer interested in feedback on this work



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eldave1
Posted: September 24th, 2019, 11:31am Report to Moderator
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Steve - read several pages - I think you have some talent on display here. However - at 150 pages you're limiting your potential - see if you can't trim it down.


My Scripts can all be seen here:

http://dlambertson.wix.com/scripts
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Scar Tissue Films
Posted: October 29th, 2019, 4:23am Report to Moderator
Of The Ancients


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This was not bad at all.


To improve it, I think you can cut down some of the dialogue and add more beats with the outside people in the first half of the script.
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