Robert Rodriguez can't do wrong with me, no matter what he does, I'm bound to be entertained. I found Machete was better than his Grindhouse effort completely. Machete is a movie you have to be in the mood for, it's a lot of fun and surprisingly has a lot more plot than I expected. Also for this type of movie, the acting was pretty impressive. I knew I'd like this movie before seeing it, Danny Trejo is awesome, he defines BAD ASS in this movie. The action sequences are great, I just wish there would be more. For the type of movie this was, there were times during tame scenes with just dialogue (that did advance the plot but..) i just wanted to see Machete kicking ass. I'm not going to lie, I'm a fan of Lindsay Lohan, I think she's one of the most interesting celebrities there is, she doesn't get much screen time but her parts are pretty funny, I feel like she was under-used in this, as well as Michelle Rodriguez. Even though there are definitely things I would have changed with this movie, with a cast that ranges from Robert De Niro to Steven Seagal, you really can't go wrong. I had a lot of fun during this movie, as did everyone else in the theater, it's over the top and never fails to meet expectations when there's an action sequence. I found the opening scene was brilliant, I wish the entire film could have kept that energy but unfortunately there are times it looses it. For what this movie is, it's great, it's probably one of my favourite films of the summer, I haven't seen Piranha but I imagine this the same mindless fun. It's a good time, has some great comedic moments. My only complaint is there were times I felt the movie did take itself too seriously, but some people could argue that it is what kept this movie from being ridiculous. Either way, it's fun, not a movie to be heavily criticized. Robert Rodriguez knows what he's doing when it comes to exploitation films and he will definitely satisfy any person looking for just that.

Probably the most mixed bag of a film I've seen in a long time. None of it was consistent. At times, the dialogue zinged. At others, it was offensively bad. Sometimes it was the script. Others, the acting.

Sometimes the acting was passable. Others, over the top stupid. Others still... just plain bad. I think de Niro's close to having played enough bad roles to cancel out some of the good ones. Fortunately, Steven Seagal's character didn't require him to emote but did require him to be fat and lethargic. Worked out well, I suppose. Danny Trejo had surprisingly little dialogue or stake in the film as a whole and yet managed to have sex with pretty much every female in the film without even trying. Guess he's just super cool.

Even the social commentary. Sometimes, RR actually came off as a guy from Texas who knows how it really is out there. At others, just a mediocre screenwriter. I mean there was a scene where a group of bad guys were literally just standing around talking about how illegal immigrants aren't all that bad. Wow, dude. Subtle. The racism was also extremely forced and cliche.

Some of the gags were cool. Some funny. Some stupid. Some... mixed. I mean, really. Nothing consistent. The story came close. I thought it was fairly plausible and well put together but towards the end, it started to completely fall apart, maybe due to RR's dumb sense of humor and movie logic.

I think the only thing that might've been consistent was the action, which was... bad. Almost all the blood and gunshots were CG and the scenes seemed to be cut in order to hide it. Obviously didn't work.

Meh. I think RR's best work is with Antonio Banderas. I wish they'd go back to working together at some point (but please, no more Spy Kids, blegh!). Outside of the Mariachi stuff, Rodriguez is just the ultimate hit and miss writer director to the point that some of his films are so bad that they'll cancel out the good ones... like de Niro's stuff is on the verge of doing.

Apparently Machete will return. Could be just a fun gag at the end but who knows? RR is obsessed with gimmicks and crowd pleasing. Let's hope those make slightly better films.

De Niro to undo his good work? Impossible.

A "re-imagining" of the feature.



Excuse me, I have to wash my hands.

E.D.

Loved this flick.  Rodriguez has a knack for making exploitation material entertaining, and Machete is no exception.

Loved all the little touches; the homage to Thriller: A Cruel Picture, with Michelle Rodriguez and her eye patch; the nod to Abel Ferarra's Ms. 45 with Lindsay Lohan (blech, though) in a habit with a massive hand cannon.  And Steven Seagal who, while his death scene was the definition of bad acting, was still a blast to see back on the big screen after all these years of direct-to-cable/video dreck.  Not to mention Rodriguez actually using all the clips he made for his Grindhouse fake Machete trailer in the actual Machete movie itself.  He could have gone back, re-cast them, re-shot them, but no, everything in the fake trailer was used in the actual movie.

I saw it three times when it first came out and have watched it twice more since getting the DVD last week.  And I agree with the OP -- in my eyes, Rodriguez can do no wrong (though I've yet to check out any of his kid movies).

Quoted from Lon though I've yet to check out any of his kid movies.

His segment in Four Rooms centered around two kids and a bellhop played by Tim Roth. It's called the Misbehavers and is IMHO the best thing he's ever done.

Otherwise, I'd steer clear. I'll give RR that his family films have an original style (very wacky, almost surrealist-influenced) and retain that trademark Mexican flavor but honestly, it's some of the worst shit I've ever seen for kids.

I've seen Four Rooms and agree, Rodriguez's was the best story in the flick.

I thought for what this was...and was supposed to be, it was great!

Always loved Danny Trejo, way before he became cool.

I thought the acting was great for the most part, but again, where it wasn't, it wasn't supposed to be.

FX for the most part were also very impressive, but then again, there were some where it was obvious it wasn't supposed to be, like Machete on that motorcycle from the original trailer.  But as James said, there were some hit and miss gags, like in the church.

Overall, I loved it. I laughed my ass off, I said, "Coooool!".  I said, "Nice...".  Good gore, but not as much as I expected. Good T & A, but again, not as much as I hoped for.  BTW, was Lindsey wearing huge hair extensions to cover up her cans in the pool scenes?  And when they did show her cans, I think it was a body double..anyone know?

It worked and brought back happy memories to when movies didn't take themselves so seriously and just good "clean" fun made a movie memorable, entertaining, and "good".

Obviously, not for everyone though.

Quoted from Dreamscale BTW, was Lindsey wearing huge hair extensions to cover up her cans in the pool scenes?  And when they did show her cans, I think it was a body double..anyone know?

I think the hair was definitely intentionally. Probably the biggest copout of the whole movie. Lohan's boobs were already on the internet so who cares really? But given her intro, they were clearly trying to play up the fact that she was in this movie and most likely showing her boobs. Her face isn't shown for the whole sequence and then at the end, she gets a big fat closeup. I mean if they didn't want to show her boobs, they could've framed the subsequent scenes differently; the extensions or whatever they were just look stupid.

Sorry, RR. Machete is no Swordfish. I'm deducting points... then adding points. The "cell phone girl" was mucho bueno.

I liked Swordfish...and Hallie's cans!

I just rented this last night.

My boyfriend said Machete sure gets a lot of play because of the machete.
Now he wants to get a bigger pocket knife.

Ahhhh...


The film, well, I have mixed feelings about it. Some parts were cool, but then some made me laugh when I think they wanted to be serious.

Swingin' from that guy's intestines was different. Kinda neat really. Never seen anything like that before.

Ok, so I guess I really liked the film. Liked it, didn't love it, but I would watch it again.

When Steven Seagal looks good in a self-mocking role, it can't be all bad.
And I was surprised Lindsay did not have a body double. Looks like a plastic job.

But Michelle Rodreguiez? How can I resist?

I'm pretty sure Lindsey did have a body double.  You never actually saw her face and cans at the same time.  I questioned this earlier in this thread, but thin king back, I'm pretty sure those nice assets weren't her actual assets.

Quoted from Dreamscale I'm pretty sure Lindsey did have a body double.  You never actually saw her face and cans at the same time.  I questioned this earlier in this thread, but thin king back, I'm pretty sure those nice assets weren't her actual assets.

I'm pretty sure Lindsay Lohan doesn't have 'assets' of any kind - she's just yuck!

Quoted from RunningFox I'm pretty sure Lindsay Lohan doesn't have 'assets' of any kind - she's just yuck!

I disagree.  She's very attractive.


Phil