Wow. If you love old-school slasher flicks, Ti West has got a very special treat just for you. I suck at reviews, not even gonna try. But I will say that I fully expect this movie to still be talked about decades from now.  Go watch it. Now!  

Someone just told me about this. It’s on Hulu right?

Nope. Theaters only.

Two thumbs up from me. Great movie. I would also definitely recommend seeing it in theatres.

]I have the flame suit on. I've already called my lawyers. I've prepared fake passports and bought several different aliases to run by. I have also transferred my funds to a European account. Why so serious? Because, here we go, While I readily concede that “X” is reasonably proficient in most respects, thumbs down. Now let's rip out it's guts...

There's not much action in this movie. You're forced to watch the actors perform. I don't know who struggles more, the actors speaking the lines or the audience who have to listen to them. This is the type of movie you have to watch with friends, a case of malt liquor, and a wicked sense of humor. It's so bad, it's a must see for horror fans. Be warned. If you're looking for gore, nudity, and excessive foul language, there's close to none of that. I would imagine some dollar stores in the future will still have a bin with movies for a buck. If you can talk 'em down to 50 cents, grab it, watch it, then return it for some Gummi Bears. Phew!

Now with that out the way, April fool's. .

OK, I wanted to say the greatest horror film ever made that scared the Bejesus out of me still remains “The Exorcist”. Now there have been only few other movies in my life that have given me nightmares after watching them.  'Jaws' scared me out of the water, 'Alien' made me afraid of space travel, after watching 'Slumber Party Massacre II' with some girlfriends many moons ago, I’ve never did look at sleep overs the same way again! Absolutely chilling.

As part of our attempt to catch up with recent releases, this one wasn't on our RADAR, but reading some rave reviews...I don't know if I drunk the kool-aid or ate the Scarecrow's mushrooms or what, we opted to make  this low budget horror production "X" a spur-of-the-moment viewing. But I went into this film with some serious skepticism, since Ti West has directed one of the worst horror sequels ever Cabin Fever 2, and I feared “X’ would leave a bad taste that wouldn't be cured by no less than a 10 gallon drum of Listerine.

That said, can’t blame Ti too much, methinks it was the studio who ruined that film. No director could save that turd.

Where to begin? Of course, by throwing out Rotten Tomatoes; A group of actors sets out to make an adult film in rural Texas under the noses of their reclusive hosts, but when the elderly couple catches their young guests in the act, the cast finds themselves in a desperate fight for their lives.

It was a slow burn, not to where you have to fight yourself from dozing off a couple of times. Ti West gives enough background and dialogue to keep things interesting and us on edge throughout withdecent, allowing viewers to see how these happy, unsuspecting folks have no idea the nightmare that’s around the corner. The first killing doesn’t occur until an hour into this 105-minute popcorn flick, at which point the "another-one-bites-the-dust" sequences takes over  to justify  it's title's cover... "Dying to show you a good time."...then steps on the gas and doesn't let up -

Ok , I am no horror /scream queen fanatic, and since I have such a low tolerance for gore but here's a bloody, and I mean bloody flick, this makes the Texas Chainsaw look like pumped versions of The Sound of Music. And there are some creative killings (does it make me an awful person for saying that?). Thought some were lame. mostly the ones with the shotgun. I was a bit underwhelmed. Reggie did not like the dance scene, thought it was ridiculous.  I'll admit, that particular death felt might have been a bit too much, but... shockingly, I thought it added to the disturbing factor of that kill.

Aside from the horror aspects, there's nudity, and good old fashioned sex scenes that provided all those awkward moments watching movies with your dad.  One of which I could've done without lol.

I definitely think that one of the creepiest parts was the cinematography. There really wasn't many shots that were groundbreaking by any means (but the aerial shot of the pond really got me fidgeting in my chair lmao). But the lighting was done really well. The purposeful darkness upon Pearl's and Howard's faces really freaked me out, because I don't like not seeing something when I know it's there.

But beyond that, the characterization of the main cast. I feel in any other movie, these characters would be annoying as all hell. Thinking back on how RZ writes horny people really makes me appreciate these characters more. They're all empathetic and caring people for the most part, with some depth.  This is what happens when characters are more than just meat for the grinder – or, for that matter, those doing the grinding.

And Pearl was absolutely living vicariously through younger people. Then killing them out of resentment. It's strange timing that I've been in my feels about getting older and then I had sympathy for the old woman. The one thing I didn’t like was hiring younger people to play older people, every time I saw them the prosthetics took me out of it a little. I’m sure many older actors would have played the older roles well. That aside, I get why West have Mia to play Pearl as well since she is in the prequel.

You know, I could argue the styling of Brittany Snow's character may be paying homage to Janet Leigh in Psycho also, with the Hitchcock blonde iconography!

Are we just going to ignore the fact one scene Pearl is so weak she is struggling to brush her hair, then the next scene she's murdering with her own brute force... Or her husband can't have sex bc of his heart, has no problem shooting a gun or carrying dead bodies... I can suspend belief for a great plot but no sir this was not a great plot. If Ti West was going to make them supernaturally strong he should have at least made them witches. Make it make sense.  

Also, clichés  are prevalent through out. I get that you need some clichés  here and there...for newcomers to horror, OK, but slasher connoisseurs will probably find it quite predictable, which could take some of the joy out of it. A minor gripe.

Another drawback, is the lack of dread. There was no true stalker moment - I wish there had been.

Verdict; I enjoyed this more than I thought I would, which is saying alot. What could have easily been a cheap, cheesy, dumbed-down slasher is elevated by realistic conversations, slow burn storytelling, and some fine direction. A fun popcorn flick.  So take the warning on the movie poster...  "Dying to show you a good time." ... seriously...

Up next! 'The Batman.'

Quoted from ghost and_ghostie gal ]I have the flame suit on. I've already called my lawyers. I've prepared fake passports and bought several different aliases to run by. I have also transferred my funds to a European account. Why so serious? Because, here we go, While I readily concede that “X” is reasonably proficient in most respects, thumbs down. Now let's rip out it's guts... There's not much action in this movie. You're forced to watch the actors perform. I don't know who struggles more, the actors speaking the lines or the audience who have to listen to them. This is the type of movie you have to watch with friends, a case of malt liquor, and a wicked sense of humor. It's so bad, it's a must see for horror fans. Be warned. If you're looking for gore, nudity, and excessive foul language, there's close to none of that. I would imagine some dollar stores in the future will still have a bin with movies for a buck. If you can talk 'em down to 50 cents, grab it, watch it, then return it for some Gummi Bears. Phew! Now with that out the way, April fool's. .

Won't lie. You got me. I was getting so upset reading your review, until I saw that you were joking. Now I feel dumb. Lmao

...

Haha! Terrific review(s), A!
In true inimitable fashion.  

I'm still not sold on the movie's premise.
I like to be scared by scary movies. Maybe not quite as scared as I was watching the Exorcist, but look-away, peek through my fingets, scared for sure.

Lots of buzz around this for sure.

I try to keep things lively. Of course, being it's Zach's birthday, I'm glad my review didn't ruin it.

Look, I was skeptical too of the premise. Is it a must see, no. Just put it on your to do list, and if you to get to it, great. And if you don't, no biggie - but I think you'd like it.

Who's seen the trailer for the prequel to X? It's called Pearl. I had no idea Pearl was connected to X until I watched its trailer. I was pleasantly surprised. It looks even better than X!