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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Screenwriting Discussion    Screenwriting Class  ›  Subtext Moderators: George Willson
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Warren
Posted: July 1st, 2016, 5:41am Report to Moderator
Of The Ancients


A man who has taught his mind to misbehave

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Hi all,

I have been trying to write very dialogue lean scripts with a lot of subtext.

Anyone who has read my scripts and comments on them will know that I seem to be missing the mark.

I feel that I am giving just enough for readers to put the pieces togeather and just the right amount of foreshadowing but obviously not.

Anyone got any tips on writing good subtext? How much is too much and how much is too little?

Seems to be the main area I'm struggling with so any advise would be appreciated.

Thanks in advance.


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Warren
Posted: July 1st, 2016, 7:36am Report to Moderator
Of The Ancients


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Thanks, CJ.

Will try applying that to my rewrite. The main issue is that a lot of my subtext (or lack thereof) is in my action.

Really not understanding where it's going so wrong. With the story clear in my head the puzzle pieces fit but no one seems to catch on.

Thanks for the advise.


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Nomad
Posted: July 1st, 2016, 9:42am Report to Moderator
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Warren,

Try hanging out at The Rocks or Bondi Beach and people-watch.  Eavesdrop on their conversations.  Contrast what they're saying against their actions.  Analyze what's really going on with the interactions within the group.

Subtext is sarcasm toned down.  Saying one thing but meaning something else.  

If you understand sarcasm then you'll have a better grasp on subtext.  
If you don't understand sarcasm then you're a very intelligent person with amazing writing skills.

Jordan


Read my scripts here:
SOCIAL EXPERIMENT 8pg-Drama
THE BRIDGE 8pg-Horror
SCHEISSE 6pg-Horror/Comedy
MADE FOR EACH OTHER-FILMED
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PrussianMosby
Posted: July 1st, 2016, 11:03am Report to Moderator
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When you establish one or two clear metaphors, the reader will understand your style and that you constantly speak and tell into another level of happenings.

When a writer successfully establishes such style in my mind – I sometimes look back and understand all the sugar you let flow in elsewhere equally. It gives you credit, when the reader experiences a writer's deep confrontation and control over the material.

In a sense: rather than intellectually shove it into our mouth, make it slow and clear till the identification of your reader with your style is completed. Then you can act free.


@  A good example may be the mother of subtext, metaphors, and complicated narrative levels: Mulholland Drive

It starts very slow, with 100% clear plot - remember the car accident and the girl fleeing to that apartment complex. There isn't much to misunderstand.

Lynch then drags us into that insanity more and more until we're absolute familiar with his confusing way of telling. And it's great.




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PrussianMosby  -  July 1st, 2016, 11:28am
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Warren
Posted: July 1st, 2016, 4:33pm Report to Moderator
Of The Ancients


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Wow. Thank you everyone for the very clear and thorough advise. It's priceless.

You have given me a lot to work with , I really can't thank you enough.


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MichaelYu
Posted: July 2nd, 2016, 5:55am Report to Moderator
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Warren,

If I were you I wouldn't add lots of subtext to dialogue. I don't understand. Some is good, not many.

Michael
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rendevous
Posted: July 2nd, 2016, 12:45pm Report to Moderator
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Missing the mark? Are you gay

? No offence meant. i believe in equality. Or do I. I'm licking butter off a knife. Ooh. A pussy walked by just now. I hear nails. Deja vu. You do. Do.

Gotta go. I need to er y'know.

R xo


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