Thanks for reading Scoob!

And thank you also for naming that guys name. I read about that stuff in the EU papers when it happened, but I forgot the guys name. When I went to write Dark Side of Man I wanted to reread some of those articles, but was unable to find them. I did some googling, but the answers that came up were just too sick to read and had nothing to do with that particular case.

If you want me to read something, just point me in the right direction.

Yes Sean, I will read yours. Patience, patience...

I will try to read as much as I can this coming week, after that I have someone I need to give all my attention to.

I've reviewed Buckets of Blood and here are my thoughts for you to use or ignore at your leisure:

First of all, not sure if this was done as more of a fun 'let's each write a segment exercise' or if this is something you are trying to package and have made - depending on your goals behind writing this I would say that

a.  Some of the action (the really over the top violence, sex, etc.) seems to me to be unfilmable - if your goal is to actually get this made then this might need to be toned down
b.  To go along with that - you could consider having a running theme throughout the four shorts that ties them all together - like they all happen on the same night in different centuries, or characters might appear (even in the background) throughout the pieces, or even something less obvious.  

Okay on to the individual works:

Pleasure Pain:

First of all, the title card has this taking place in the 19th century - to me that brings to mind the issue of modernization of Japanese culture, etc. like in The Last Samurai - to me the feel of this short seems like it should be a few centuries back - kinda nitpicky on my part - sorry.  

To me the teaser opening feels unnecessary - does the audience need to know that we will be seeing vampire prostitutes later?

At points I feel the emperor talks too much - maybe you can cut down on his long diatribes - and I would lose his voiceover - maybe have a palace guard give them the lowdown.  

I liked the Japanese samurai fighting vampires angle - it was cool although at times I felt like you contemporized the language they would use too much.  Maybe its just me but I can't visualize a Japanese warrior saying 'whore' 'bitch' etc.

Perhaps the emperor being a vampire as well is a bit predictable but in line with this story I think it works - but I definitely think you need an actual ending with a conclusion - heck you could even set it up and then have the ending at the end of the run of shorts like in Sin City.  

The Dead and The Deader:

First of all what happens to George?  What don't we see him anymore?  Maybe its just me but I wanted him back in there somewhere.  

William (45) - seems to me he should either be younger (since he calls Harlan 'sir') or presented as more of a stupid follower of Harlan.

Like the first one some of the language seems a bit too contemporary to me - if its supposed to be in New Orleans Reconstruction-era to me they should use more southern/dated slang and less cursing (yeah I know Deadwood had it in there - guess its a matter of opinion if it was successful).

Since its a short some characterization problems arise for me - why is Harlan such a bastard?  Did he lose everything in the Civil War?  What would make Elizabeth fall in love with a black man in that time and place knowing the consequences?  And what exactly is the situation with the sheriff and Harlan?

You kind of lost me with the bloody orgy.  

I noticed some mispellings that you might want to clean up.  

I liked the setting and the underlying story - some more characterization would go a long way.  

Twitch:

This section seemed very similiar to movies like the Grunge and the Ring.

I really liked the opening scene in the movie theater - I was actually bummed out when Riley died and we lost the movie theater location.  Maybe I just like the idea of something in a movie theater creeping out the bored staff that work there.  Allso compared to the other three shorts this is the only one that is significantly more than a day or so which makes it seem a little different in tone than all the rest.  

Anyway, that being said, the overall feel of this short was definitely creepy - good work on that.  

A few things -

Haley appears kind of out of nowhere - where was she at the funeral?  

What state does this take place?  I only ask because the thought of building a pool around Xmas time seemed out of place to me.  

Also the fight Emily has with her mom after Haley's death seemed a bit unrealistic - I can't see a mom that lost a daughter on top of just losing a son say "yeah we both feel pretty shitty" and then starting a fight about the stepdad-stepdaughter drama.  But that's just me...

Putting her mom in a woodchipper seems a little too Fargo to me.  

This section seemed to me to have the most characterization and background of all the shorts - you really do learn a lot about these people throughout the horrible events that occur - good job.

The Dark Side of Man:

This one was, for me, the most disturbing because it has the 'hey that might actually be happening' factor going for it.  

Ally only has two lines of dialogue - was this intentional?  You might want to not have her mouth gagged for the most of the time - there are so few characters in this short that having her throw out a few lines here and there seems like it would be beneficial to me.  

I personally would find this more effective if you have the events leading up to the beginning of this included - how they meet, the way the party starts, when it turns bad, etc. etc.  - it getting more and more creepy would work well - but that may make this way too long for a short, but still I think the opportunity to lengthen it is there.  

Having never seen Hostel I'm not sure how similiar this is to that movie besides what I've heard of it - this strikes me as being in the same vein - if so, obviously just be carfeul to not be too similiar.  

The ending for me is slightly problematic - I think a very small percentage of people would be into watching this type of stuff on their computer (and those that would probably wouldn't share it with anyone else) - maybe having one like it 'looking so real' while the other roommate shakes his head or something might work better.

Well that's about it - let me know if you have any questions.  As I said before - this was all just my humbel opinion.  Thanks for letting me take a look at it.  Now I think I need to go read something light and breezy to wash away all those buckets of blood.

Quoted from tomson Thanks for reading Scoob! And thank you also for naming that guys name. I read about that stuff in the EU papers when it happened, but I forgot the guys name. When I went to write Dark Side of Man I wanted to reread some of those articles, but was unable to find them. I did some googling, but the answers that came up were just too sick to read and had nothing to do with that particular case. If you want me to read something, just point me in the right direction..

Hi Pia,
Yeah that article was sick, I remember when it hit the news. I think you did a great job of writing about such a thing but making it completly enjoyable aswell.
I dont really have any shorts at the moment but if you have a feature I'd be happy to do a swap some time.

Thanks for the read Langdon, I'm the sick bastard that wrote the dead and the deader, and I know it's not for all tastes, I wanted to do what you could call a vomitorium, kinda like The Thing, one gross out moment after another.  I thought an orgy with animal sacrifice mixed in wold be a disgusting image.  My next B.OB entry is totally different, it will be much more character driven and not as violent, but probably just as squeamish, this is a zombie story, my next one will be more grounded in reality.

Anyways, thanks again for the read.

Langdon...,

Yeah a lot of people have compared Twitch to The Ring or The Grudge and I agree. This idea that I used was meant to be a feature and I actually tried writing it as one, but it wasn't working out the way I thought it would have. And while brainstorming, I was actually going to have it stay at a theater (someone falls down the stairs and breaks their neck, another person gets their eye impaled by the oil dispenser in the popcorn machine and the oil goes out and basically bakes their insides, I don't know).

I have to agree, Haley just pops up, but she was at the funeral, I just didn't mention her.

I'm not sure what state this is in, haha, but the reason why they're building a pool around Christmas is because they want it to be ready just as it starts warming up so they have all late spring and summer to go swimming.

Yeah, with the argument that Emily and her mom has, it does seem unrealistic. And in Fargo, it doesn't really show much except for a leg sticking out of the chipper. In my script, you see the body go inside, while the person is alive, and, well, you see everything.

Thanks for reading and if there's anything of yours that you'd like me to read, just PM me or whatever.

Sean

Langdon,

Thanks for reading. I will get to yours as soon as possible. I'll print it out and start reading it this weekend.

I tried to make this as "real" as possible. Disturbing as it is, most of it is stuff I've read about. Even the part about the guys watching it on their pc. You'd be surprised what people watch and what's available on the web. Makes one wonder about us humans.

I understand how you feel about needing to go read something light and breezy. I would even understand if you feel like you need to take a bath.  

Thanks again,

Pia

Quoted from langdon alger Pleasure Pain: First of all, the title card has this taking place in the 19th century - to me that brings to mind the issue of modernization of Japanese culture, etc. like in The Last Samurai - to me the feel of this short seems like it should be a few centuries back - kinda nitpicky on my part - sorry.   To me the teaser opening feels unnecessary - does the audience need to know that we will be seeing vampire prostitutes later? At points I feel the emperor talks too much - maybe you can cut down on his long diatribes - and I would lose his voiceover - maybe have a palace guard give them the lowdown.   I liked the Japanese samurai fighting vampires angle - it was cool although at times I felt like you contemporized the language they would use too much.  Maybe its just me but I can't visualize a Japanese warrior saying 'whore' 'bitch' etc. Perhaps the emperor being a vampire as well is a bit predictable but in line with this story I think it works - but I definitely think you need an actual ending with a conclusion - heck you could even set it up and then have the ending at the end of the run of shorts like in Sin City.

Thanks for the review, Langdon. Nice Simpsons reference BTW.

I can agree with most of your points there are two I feel obligated to address.

First, the 19th century. I didn't do too much research into the time but I'm pretty sure Japan was still Imperial at this time. I don't think the modernization rely applied to this particular story. There were definitely still ninjas running around. The Last Samurai had a few. I set the story when I did because I wasn't positive they had the same kind of brothels before then. Maybe I'm wrong and the story could've been set some other time. In any case, I don't think it matters. I can't think of any outstanding historical inaccuracies off the top of my head and, for the most part, I try to get my facts straight.

I've also gotten a lot of comments about the dialogue. I figured the modernization of it wasn't too much of an issue. I've seen enough Japanese films to know they really don't speak that differently than those of us in the Western hemisphere, even a century or two behind. Also, this wasn't really meant to be a serious period piece, as I'm sure you noticed. I wanted this one to be easy to get into and enjoy. I didn't want the readers to get too caught up with period dialogue. Had the tone been different, I wouldn't planned otherwise.

Also, I've seen plenty of period movies where the words "bitch" and "whore" were used plentifully.

Thanks again for the read.