Yeah she getting emotional struck me as odd too. Despite good acting it was off contextually, IMO. Nicely shot film. Everything good right down to the incidentals which drew me into a comedy-type feel. I think that's why her overly-emotional response was wrong. Have to blame the director for that really.

I think the emotion could have worked if tinted with irony hinting at her own neurosis. Not too much, just enough so that we notice it in retrospect. That would give the twist a little more impact. As it is it kinda falls flat.

They should have asked you to do the rewrite.

Good stuff though mate, good luck on getting some more of your work made.

Quoted from DustinBowcot They should have asked you to do the rewrite.

Until the end, I thought their rewrite was pretty good. With that twist though, they should have made more changes. Why e.g. was the guy reappearing in the girl's life if he was trying to break up with her? It doesn't make sense.

A decent short film though, with talented actors.

This was decent, I liked the cutaways to the beret wearing classroom and the guy bumming money so he can buy Eric's book. The acting was strong although it seemed like Megan was on the verge of cracking up numerous times. I guess half of that was down to the bizarre situation and, in some ways, it complimented her character's reactions to Eric's absurdity. Plus it kept the tone light and tongue in cheek which is what you want.

However, her emotionally heartfelt scene at the end jarred because of the that. Things got way too serious for a moment, totally out of step with the what had come before. It was actually a good performance its just felt like it was from a different film...but to the filmmaker's credit, I felt they rescued it with the altered ending. The film's return to levity after Megan's earnest outpouring was sorely needed and it delivered.

I think it would be kind of missing point to highlight the ridiculousness of Eric's elaborate plan to get rid of her as the short itself resides very much in planet ridiculous. At least that was the tone I got from reading the script so I thought the ending worked well.

Wasn't a fan of the ending at all -- made me wonder if the director wanted a little revenge on some ex-girlfriend who once had a similar opinion of him...

Really liked the first nine-ish minutes, though. Consistently funny and totally enjoyable to watch, which is pretty impressive for a low-budget short with two people sitting and talking. Definitely a testament to the writing.

Awesome work Jon!

Thanks for watching, all! I'm delighted with how well produced it is, and think both Eric and Victoria did a great job.

Col - yeah, I like the additions too, good ideas. It was years ago that I wrote it (urgh), but I think I was conscious of keeping it as simple - and cheap - as possible, settings-wise, to help its chances of being picked up. So naturally very pleased the filmmakers went to the added trouble of finding locations and actors that the original script didn't even call for!

Good job. Wasn't too big of a fan of some of the shots used but it looks like they put some effort into making it look nice.