He Drives Them - Crazy by David Lambertson (eldave1) - Short, Drama - An Uber Driver hearing voices in his head seeks a passenger to end his misery. 10 pages - pdf format

Writer interested in feedback on this work

I like this one. Good interesting story with a satisfying ending. Keep me guessing, so good job.

A lot of telling instead of just showing. The descriptions are bloated because of it.

~Zack~

SPOILERS AHEAD

Best of the ones I've read today - interesting premise, though flawed, but definitely interesting.

First off - what's with the giant typeface for the title? Minor niggle, I know, and I have seen this on pro scripts, but just didn't think it necessary.

Rather too much description - you don't really need " It’s intermittently lit by the red glow of the neon
sign. It’s there - and then it’s not. And it's there again" for example. Too much.

You also give too much direction to actors - they won't thank you!

At one point it reminded me of the first script I read today - "And the Darkness Fades" but it went off in a different direction. Does suggest there are only so many variations on this theme.

Ending would have been better on the "Fades into a heartbeat - LUB DUB - LUB DUB - LUB DUB...
Then silence" rather than the news reader's voice over. That really wasn't necessary and was too blunt. Again evidence of a bit too much information.

Good though.

4 out of 5

I didn't get enough of a why he was suicidal and the Demonic VO didn't work for me.

But it's well written and has a decent premise, good effort.

I liked it.

I felt for the man with the gun, that's a tough one, butthe guy's got problems and someone needs to fix them. That all worked for me. A tiny issue for me would be the fact he's driving an Uber, Christ knows what his rating would look like.

Anyway, well written, no formatting niggles or typos.

Good job

Cam

I liked this one. It had grit. The passage where the hostage points the gun at her temple was a clever moment. Ditch the radio broadcaster voice over - it reads better without it. I was disappointed that the demonic voice didn't jump to the hostage.

Very nice. I think I know who wrote this one, too.

Congrats on a job well done.

Cindy

Quoted from grademan I was disappointed that the demonic voice didn't jump to the hostage.

Wouldn't that have been a bit "Fallen"?

I had some problems with this one:

I had a hard time imagining the Demon VO as being anything other than corny on screen.

I also thought that the ending essentially negated the whole of the script...making any lessons learned or any developments moot. The character arcs of both main characters stay the same. Gerald wants to die, and does. The girl doesn't want to kill, and doesn't.

I'd consider making the girl unstable as well. So that they're both undergoing a demonic test...but she manages to save herself, whilst he kills himself and damns himself. That would complete the story.

I liked most of it, some I didn't.  Usually a lot of description slows it down too much, but somehow it worked here.  Not completely, still overwritten in many areas.  Some missteps, like not having the car come to a stop before she gets out (I know it's assumed but I feel it needs to be put in), but the tension revved up good and I really did feel bad for the driver.  Once I got through page one, it was a breeze to read.  Then, it slowed down a little at the very end.  Still good job and could get filmed.

Not bad, good premise, not sure it fully paid off for me, but some nice suspense building. Denouement needed more imh, something from left field. Easier said than done, I know. Definitely met the 'trapped' challenge.

I was enjoying this up until about page 5 I think it was.

I feel there is a bit of a hole in the story. He needs her to kill him because he can't do it, but he can in fact kill them both, essentially killing himself, huh? Am I missing something?

I feel that when Sandra says "my life is in your hands, Gerald" it again makes no sense. Hasn't her life always been in his hands and it was part of the ultimatum that she might die anyway.

Wasn't a fan of the ending either, didn't need the voice over.

Quoted from Warren I feel there is a bit of a hole in the story. He needs her to kill him because he can't do it, but he can in fact kill them both, essentially killing himself, huh? Am I missing something?

That's a good point - hadn't struck me when I was reading it but you're right - if he couldn't bring himself to kill himself, then the force of his threat to kill both of them was voided. Which leaves the author with a bit of a problem!

Easy fix.

1. Have devil as a character in the front seat. That gets rid of corny VO.
2. Have Gerald trying to kill himself but stopped by the Devil...you aren't getting out that easy.

Quoted from SimonM Wouldn't that have been a bit "Fallen"?

Good point. I guess my point was to identify who or what was behind the voice. Was it a past trauma? Someone messing with his meds? Was it supernatural as in Fallen?

Gary

Good premise - I liked it.

But I have no idea why he decided to do today. The voices (or is it just one voice?) got really active maybe? That's my main question.

I didn't care when Sandra started to swear. She doesn't sound like someone that will. Their dialog was not very smooth for me. And they essentially talked about nothing. I wish the Voice told him something interesting. Maybe something about his past. Why is he crazy? Did something happen to him in the past that made him go bonkers? In real life he would be crazy just because he happened to be this way - but for a movie we could have an interesting reason. And connect it with what happens in the car.
You could make it really interesting I think.

When voice said "she will die too" - that was funny. Don't think you want funny in this one. Good job.

Nice until he threatens to drive into traffic to kill them both.
Thought the Voice Over at the end was too simple a way out.
Liked it. Just saw a few problems.

It was different, more to the spirit of the OWC.  She was trapped.  

It was pretty well written, albeit too much description, especially with the neon light and other sections like that one.

I'd like to know more about why did he have to die today.  He's had voices for who knows how long, why today?  

It was a decent first draft, but, expanded and better planned between everyone would make this much better.

7/10.

Dan

I was wondering why the voice was telling Gerald that he had to die, and why now?

The writing was good and the overall concept was decent.  I really enjoyed this, the best I've read so far.

A great read and it flowed really well.

Great character interaction between Gerald and Sandra... I guess the bigger picture is why he had to kill himself with the demon voice in his head.

Maybe he was on meds?
Maybe he did a hit and run?

I'm sure this is one you could rewrite to answer some loopholes, but overall one of the better entries.

Some notes

The voice over demon didn't work for me.  It might be better if you hint that maybe there aren't voices, that it's something else.  A bit of mystery goes a long way.

the idea is solid.  He can't do himself, so he figures out a way to have it done to him.  

Best
Richard

Some notes.

The demon VO didn't work for me.  You might get more mileage by having the audience wonder if he actually hears voices of it's merely part of his argument to get himself killed.  Otherwise, a solid idea.

Best
Richard

Not bad.  Not bad at all.

It's overwritten in many places and as written, I'm not sure it would really work onscreen the way you want it to, but it definitely has the challenge in spirit, is decently written, and has a story that, although a little flawed, works and keeps me engaged.

I don't buy that Gerald is going to kill them both in a head on collision, nor do I buy that Sandra is going to kill herself...or that she would even come up with that.

Overall, it's a success.  Grade B-.

Good job.

Quite liked that.

In particular I liked the loop with the next rider being caught, doing the deed and then being caught up in the situation.

As with any script you will tweak this after but the basis is sound.

I could almost picture the voice appearing alongside him, then alongside her - that only we could we see.

I would also think the demonic voice would be less offensive, and more persuasive.

Consider

Warning: Stream of Consciousness notes to follow…

Ooooh, you already got me with the first line: No moon. Dark as death.  Nice!

Wow – I’m loving the writing.  Whoever this is, is a pro.

Like a child not wanting to see the Doctor’s needle.  Awesome.  Rich visuals.  NOT overwritten, but wonderfully descriptive.

Page two: one extra space in front of  “his brow” – but I’m sure someone’s already mentioned that.

Page two: dressed for hunting men.  Dammit, anonymous writer – you’re awesome!

Page three: do you know where you’re going?  Yes.  Oooo, the subtext in this is delicious.  (Did I happen to just get in a good mood today? Nah – it’s the writing, too.)

Page 4: We can do it here.  Ominous.  And a great (obvious) misunderstanding from Sandra.

Page 7: Great twist with Sandra’s response (don’t know that I would’ve thought of that – either in a story, or IRL.)

Hmmm – I do think I’ll start to love the ending once it absorbs.  Though – I think the Demon Voice needs one last snarky line before we get to the radio report.

Stellar job!  This, and one other OWC submission so far are huge yeses in my book…

Well done.

A rec.

Writer,

Pretty good. I like the suicidal driver aspect of it and the tension it creates. This was a wee bit overwritten in some places, but not too badly. I think I like the exchange of the gun to the passenger -- it works, although at first I was thinking it a bit abrupt. I keep seeing, and not just you, doors locking. Maybe once we'll see the passenger looking outside and notice how fast they're going and not even dare to jump. Sorry, had to vent. And I just got on another writer for ending his/her script with a newspaper headline -- but here, over the radio, it works. Anyway, good job! A consider.

Steve

It was an interesting scenario you set-up here. And fairly unpredictable as well. Just when I thought I knew what the characters were up to you threw me a curveball. The downside is that some of those curveballs came at the expense of logic.

First, I never saw Sandra being able to shoot him in the back of the head for the simple reason that it would look like murder to anyone arriving on the scene. I imagine this happened because of the challenge criteria, but there are better ways to commit suicide by self defense than what Gerald proposes. I also didn't see the logic of Sandra threatening to kill herself to stop Gerald. Gerald had already indicated he was willing to kill her. The whole situation just escalated way too quickly, and is really only saved because none of the characters actually do the absurd things they're threatening. So maybe it's all just bluster, but it still needs some smoothing over at least.

Okay, so Gerald finally found someone to this. It actually works better off screen though cause it allows me to imagine any number of characters he may have picked up who’d be willing to do this.

So this was a pretty good depiction of a mentally unstable guy trying not to do horrible things. I think it needed a little more of a twist at the end. He finally found someone to do it, but that's a matter of trial and error. He was bound to find someone sooner or later. In the meantime, it would've been nice to know exactly what Gerald was attempting to not do. I mean, I can guess, but should I have to?

Best so far for me (so far...). Would have pushed me further if the 'Demonic Voice' was just a pathetic Gerald voice and if the story ended without the radio broadcast. Keep me guessing as to what happens with the next fare. Nice work.

He Drives Them Crazy! Bum BUM Bum! Like no one else! Bum BUM Bum!

Pretty solid thriller, and dare I say, better than what I tried to do.

I don't feel it was overwritten or that the VO was corny.

Recommended A+

The writing is great. The descriptions in particular are phenomenal. I was invested up until the moment Sandra pointed the gun at herself. That rang false to me.

I don't think you've built up enough of a connection between these two people for her to do that. She gets in a car with a guy who immediately locks her in, says he's hearing voices, and points a gun at her. Is she really gonna go out on a limb and point a gun at herself to help him make a choice that keeps them both alive?

I realize you don't have much space to work with. But I feel like you need something early on before the doors lock. Some little moment of chemistry between them before the action starts. Maybe a bit of shared past, or just a shared joke... something so they can connect on some level and that would explain her going out of her way to help a deranged man she barely knows.

Regardless, you get a CONSIDER.

Breezed by thanks to strong writing. The ending didn't do much for me. He wants to die and dies -- not much of a story. The demonic voice would be goofy onscreen.

But everything is nonetheless strong, here. Find a better option than the demonic voice, find a more interesting end to this conflict, and this is a very solid (and easily low budget) short that I'm sure could be produced.

I wanted to know more about her and less about him -- we get it, he's got a demon on his shoulder -- and I think that's where the shift needs to come. It's not really a story about him. It's about her, and the choices she makes when she's confronted with this crazy situation. Right now, as others have noted, you have her figuring him out far too quickly and taking a huge risk. If that were the crux of the story -- she's willing to risk her life on her ability to read this guy -- it'd be an interesting one. But that beat is missed a little bit. What tells her that he won't let her shoot herself? What tells her that she has a chance of getting out?

I'd almost rather see a very short first scene with him, and then a longer first scene with her. Get to know her a bit. Does she believe in basic human goodness? Does she have a crucifix around her neck? Is this the first time she's ever had the courage to wear this particular dress outside the house?

Very enjoyable. Solid work all around.

Deep, dark, and satisfying. I like the character twist of Gerald's alter ego demanding more from him than the average demon... all or nothing to prove his worth. This demon (only known as HE) obviously has an escape route already planned out, like a virus that kills its host as long as there's another (corporeal) nearby to accept it. I bet the man in custody can already feel it tingling within.

I would drop the "I am" when there's a reference of being crazy, IMO... the truly insane do not realize they are, save that Gerald could lay blame or reference toward his unwanted (demonic) guest... "I'm not... but HE certainly is" might even refer to a collective or hive of spirits within. That would seriously put a quagmire on Sandra's face.

Awesomely sinister...

The setup is great, it really makes you nervous and worry about this guy's unsuspecting customer. A bit overly written, I see some of the comments like this aspect but actors do not appreciate being given acting directions in a script. E.G.

"Gerald brings a pistol to his mouth and presses it against his closed lips. Sweat beads on his forehead. His breathing becomes heavier. His chest heaves up and down. He wraps his lips around the barrel and slowly slides it into his mouth. He places a finger on the trigger."

You are even telling the actor how to breathe here! This is fine in a short story but leaner is better in screenplays.  

The cracks starts to appear once Gerald tries to get Sandra to shoot him. If he can't shoot himself, he can't kill himself so his threat to drive into traffic is a bluff which Sandra would easily see through. Her threat to kill herself was totally unbelievable also.

And then the ending was a letdown. He started off wanting to die so he dies, not only that but he has persuaded some other poor schmuck to do so. It feels like watching the beginning of Alien 3 when Hicks and Newt are just dead and I was thinking, "Well what was he point of them going through all that in Aliens just to die off-screen for no reason?"

The voice is an interesting aspect and worth developing. How will the audience know it is a Demon voice? Is it in his mind or is it truly demonic? If you explore the latter you'll find options opening up in the story you could exploit.

But well written, trapped in the taxi and fairly low budget so it hits all the marks for me, just needs some work on the story and this could be very producible.

-Mark

Cool title for my taste. The execution here is good all along. There's a lot tension on display, although, that said, the plot you deal with is quite generic. The ending, I felt, could improve. I interpreted it as: when the scenario started again, there's an alternative version happening later with him being shot on the freeway. Though I'm not sure if this is how it's meant…

I didn't get the definite state of their relationship. I thought they know each other before but HOW (exact background) wasn't precise enough since their exchange read more like vague allusions in that direction I couldn't connect with 100%.

Even though the plotting and twists are quite skillful presented, it's still a bit generic… I have to say that.

In the end, my nagging on plot is secondary here; in general, it's very good quality- especially your personal skills shine in this piece.


@ ah, I understand now. It wasn't meant as a repeating style ending, rather there was a new passenger who took the decision at the freeway, the girl refused to take.

Quoted from Heretic Breezed by thanks to strong writing. The ending didn't do much for me. He wants to die and dies -- not much of a story.

Perhaps a better ending would be to have him be shot - but the demon won't let him die and he ends up stuck on life support, still hearing the voices as he lies in his hospital bed unable to move or escape...

Creepy character, simple use of location, rising tension, stakes etc.  Seemed like Gerald could’ve called her bluff, but not a deal breaker.  Not entirely convinced of the logic - he can’t shoot himself but he can swerve into traffic?
Not a huge fan of the ‘Demonic V.O’, one suggestion might be to incorporate it within the Sat Nav Voice - little snippets that only Gerald can hear guiding him to kill.  A good read, a few tweaks should take care of the logic issues.

I feel like this would work better if he saw people instead of just hearing them. Other than that, great script!

I got a lot of reads on this and (a) wanted to thank everyone for the reads and comments and (b) address some of the common themes.

DEMONIC VOICE

Pretty much universally disliked. I think a large part of that was my unfortunate use of the term "Demonic" and as such frequently viewed as the Devil or an evil being. In my mind (unfortunately not so much on the page) the driver suffered from a schizophrenic disorder and this was the crazy voice in his head that he wanted to kill. I will rewrite with a better term to describe the voice and see if that works better.

LOGIC ISSUES

Many comments in this regard, including:

If he wanted to kill himself, why wouldn't he just drive into the traffic, The point there was supposed to be that he couldn't do it - couldn't pull the trigger himself - and the driving into traffic was a bluff on his part to get her to do it for him. I'll see if I cant make that clearer in the dialogue between him and her.

Why would she put the gun to her head- after all she didn't want to die because she wouldn't shoot him? Again, this was meant as a bluff on her part after she figured out that he didn't/wouldn't want to kill anyone. She was merely using the bluff as a way to get out of the car. So, again - many folks didn't think that was clear so I will make some revisions there to make sure that is clarified.

THE VOICE OVER AT THE END:

Several posters did not like this and some thought the story could stop earlier. Going to keep it the same as is here. One of the points of the story was to show that the contrast between people - those that would have put a bullet in the head of the driver to save their life and those that would not. So - I need the conclusion (e.g., someone actually does it). Maybe with the other corrections above - it would make it clearer. Simon had an interesting suggestion on this which I might use.

Two specific points from Khamanna:

1. ...I didn't care when Sandra started to swear. She doesn't sound like someone that will.
Their dialog was not very smooth for me. And they essentially talked about nothing. I wish the Voice told him something interesting. Maybe something about his past....

2. ....When the voice said "she will die too" - that was funny. Don't think you want funny in this one.

Both points resonated with me - others also shared the same concern raised in # 1 - good rewrite tools here.

OVER DESCRIBING

Several comments on over describing. Actually, this is one area that I am quite comfortable with and am going to leave as is. I have just found myself enjoying scripts more when there is a little more description and right or wrong I am moving my writing in that direction. (Who knows - maybe will reverse some time in the future.

Again - much thanks to all who read and commented!!! The notes were great and very useful.

Quoted from eldave1 I got a lot of reads on this and (a) wanted to thank everyone for the reads and comments and (b) address some of the common themes. DEMONIC VOICE Pretty much universally disliked. I think a large part of that was my unfortunate use of the term "Demonic" and as such frequently viewed as the Devil or an evil being. In my mind (unfortunately not so much on the page) the driver suffered from a schizophrenic disorder and this was the crazy voice in his head that he wanted to kill. I will rewrite with a better term to describe the voice and see if that works better. LOGIC ISSUES Many comments in this regard, including: If he wanted to kill himself, why wouldn't he just drive into the traffic, The point there was supposed to be that he couldn't do it - couldn't pull the trigger himself - and the driving into traffic was a bluff on his part to get her to do it for him. I'll see if I cant make that clearer in the dialogue between him and her. Why would she put the gun to her head- after all she didn't want to die because she wouldn't shoot him? Again, this was meant as a bluff on her part after she figured out that he didn't/wouldn't want to kill anyone. She was merely using the bluff as a way to get out of the car. So, again - many folks didn't think that was clear so I will make some revisions there to make sure that is clarified. THE VOICE OVER AT THE END: Several posters did not like this and some thought the story could stop earlier. Going to keep it the same as is here. One of the points of the story was to show that the contrast between people - those that would have put a bullet in the head of the driver to save their life and those that would not. So - I need the conclusion (e.g., someone actually does it). Maybe with the other corrections above - it would make it clearer. Simon had an interesting suggestion on this which I might use. Two specific points from Khamanna: 1. ...I didn't care when Sandra started to swear. She doesn't sound like someone that will. Their dialog was not very smooth for me. And they essentially talked about nothing. I wish the Voice told him something interesting. Maybe something about his past.... 2. ....When the voice said "she will die too" - that was funny. Don't think you want funny in this one. Both points resonated with me - others also shared the same concern raised in # 1 - good rewrite tools here. OVER DESCRIBING Several comments on over describing. Actually, this is one area that I am quite comfortable with and am going to leave as is. I have just found myself enjoying scripts more when there is a little more description and right or wrong I am moving my writing in that direction. (Who knows - maybe will reverse some time in the future. Again - much thanks to all who read and commented!!! The notes were great and very useful.

Dave,
      I think the demonic voice is okay IF it comes from someplace.  Why not have it come thru the radio?  He's schizophrenic anyways, so, it wouldn't be that far-fetched.  The issue that many had was the fact that it just comes out of thin air.  

I'd carry his mental illness further, perhaps with visual clues too.  Perhaps picking up some clues how they act might help you flesh out his character a bit more.  

I find dialog very hard, so, I can't add much there.  I mean, for mine, I talked around the end of the world, but then, got dinged about the dialog being on the nose about other topics.  It is almost impossible to not have any dialog that is OTN.  

Lets face it, everything we write, from what the camera sees to what the characters say, is for the reader to get some clue about something.  

This story was good.  It was tense.  I didn't have a clue with her being smart enough to figure out how to get out of the cab alive without shooting him.  Perhaps show her with a "Top of her class" certificate or something like that, to show she's really smart.  Or show she's a psych major.  That way, we shouldn't have any reasons why to doubt how she'd come up with that response.  

The biggest issue is why today?  People with mental issues deal daily.  What made today the reason for his acceptance that he must die?  If you can add all that stuff in (there's no page limit if you redo it) and I think you have a pretty killer script that can be easily produced.

Let me know if I can help.

Dan

Hi Dave,

I gave this script a read and really like it. I haven't read any of the other comments so there may be repetition in my comments.

I think your writing is generally spot on but there are a few occasions where you could trim down. I'm thinking mainly in the first scene, where short, cutting sentences may set the tone more. For example, 'His hand begins to shake. The barrel of the gun rattles against his teeth.' Rather than flowing those two thoughts into a structured sentence.

I love the idea and the execution (pardon the pun) but I would have liked to see the guy who did it. Not necessarily, the actual act (you could even leave it so you don't know if it's him or not), but I just feel there's potential to take this further with another character. How would he react if he starts to feel like this is 'the one' before he even does anything?

I don't need any more backstory about his mental illness just his reaction to a different situation.

Great stuff - looking forward to your feature.

Ste

Thanks much for the read and the comments - much appreciated.

Quoted Text .... but I would have liked to see the guy who did it. Not necessarily, the actual act (you could even leave it so you don't know if it's him or not), but I just feel there's potential to take this further with another character. How would he react if he starts to feel like this is 'the one' before he even does anything?

Interesting that you should mention this. I am toying around with an idea for a feature or maybe short TV series. Part 1 - same as it is. Part 2 - the story of the guy (let's call him Ed) who shot him and what happened to him as a result. Part 3 - The story of Ed's wife and how the change in Ed from the incident ruined their marriage. Part 4 - the story of their children and the impact from the divorce......etc. etc. Until somehow in the last part we come full circle back to a the driver.  Have not worked out the kinks but am toying with it.

Again - thanks for the read and comments

Sounds interesting Dave. Put me down as a reader of any drafts if needs be.

Ste

Thanks much

"Are you fucking crazy?", "I am".

Enjoyable little thriller. Like the various devices and directions, you use to keep the tension going on.
Felt contained, especially with the alley bookends. You make good use of the two main players, think the actors would enjoy the script, and the dialogue, which is small and to the point.
The descriptions are very poetic for me, but they do the job.

Thanks, friend - appreciate the kind words.

This one has had an odd history. I let an L.A based student use if for free (I still retain all rights to sell it). She produced a movie.

Trailer here:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zEflhxLBqNI

Finished the film - posted it online - then took it down never to be heard from. A weird one for me. She did all that work and then let it go. Odd.

The trailer looked impressive for a short.

Directing a film, even a short film is a baptism of fire. The hardest thing I ever done, next to coping with the death of my mother.

Quoted from HyperMatt The trailer looked impressive for a short. Directing a film, even a short film is a baptism of fire. The hardest thing I ever done, next to coping with the death of my mother.

The film wasn't bad either - she just lost interest and took it down. I can imagine all the hard work which makes it more mysterious to me.

I have never directed/produced anything but I can imagine it is an ass ache.

I lost my father when I was 35 so I certainly can feel your pain there.

Quoted from eldave1 The film wasn't bad either - she just lost interest and took it down. I can imagine all the hard work which makes it more mysterious to me.

Hi Dave,

Did you not receive your own digital copy of the film to put up?

The four things I ask for when giving a script to a filmmaker are that I want writers credit on the film, writers credit on IMDb (if the film gets listed), my own digital copy of the completed film, and to retain the rights to the script.

Quoted from Warren Hi Dave, Did you not receive your own digital copy of the film to put up? The four things I ask for when giving a script to a filmmaker are that I want writers credit on the film, writers credit on IMDb (if the film gets listed), my own digital copy of the completed film, and to retain the rights to the script.

No.

The free option had that provision (a digital copy within XX days) - among several others -  or else the rights would be revoked. So, the producer put the film up on, I asked for the copy. The Producer took it down and then stopped returning correspondence like she felt off the face of the earth.  So I do own the script still.  Weird.

As seen here:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L5BrX70upQc

Okay - done by a first time film student with no money.

- I thought she did a god job on a shoe string budget
- I would not have cast her is the female  protag but I think all she could afford was one actor (the driver). So
- I love students - it is rewarding watching them grow in the craft.

Have since re-optioned this so there will be another version.

Congratulations! Looks great!  

thanks - visually, thought she did real well for a student

Congrats, Dave!

Quoted from Warren Congrats, Dave!

Thanks

Congratulations! Has this been filmed twice? Just reading through the thread and it seems a bit of an odd history lol!

Quoted from MarkRenshaw Congratulations! Has this been filmed twice? Just reading through the thread and it seems a bit of an odd history lol!

The first time was just the trailer

Congrats!

Quoted from MarkItZero Congrats!

Gracias

Awesome title! I, like the others, had issues with the Demon V.O. that read and viewed as distraction.

Overall, a good step in the right direction. You're on the right path.

Quoted from S.J. Awesome title! I, like the others, had issues with the Demon V.O. that read and viewed as distraction. Overall, a good step in the right direction. You're on the right path.

Thanks - appreciate the read

Where was this filmed?

Quoted from Arundel Where was this filmed?

Los Angeles