All screenplays on the simplyscripts.com and simplyscripts.net domain are copyrighted to their respective authors. All rights reserved. This screenplaymay not be used or reproduced for any purpose including educational purposes without the expressed written permission of the author.
A super clean read. The expression isn't dramatic enough though. Like: Why didn't she care before? And why then should I be touched by those people? There's just a dramatic element missing that makes us identify more and make them reasonable. Still, not bad. 3
Who knows what happens next or what has happened before (or why)? All these one-pagers are completely self-contained. Readers can infer certain things if they pay attention to what the writer has implied. This applies to a lot of scripts in this competition, which is what makes the one-page challenge so fascinating.
That said, I take this one at face value. It's poignant. Thumbs up.
Great job. This is one I'm putting on reserve until I review the others - definitely gets a 4, may get a 5 depending on the quality of the rest. Simple, yet moving, with the one line of dialogue being an extremely powerful statement.
One of the criteria I'm using in my head is to test if the story would be enhanced at 5 pages. This one doesn't need additional pages. The theme was conveyed perfectly, and there's a complete story within the 60 seconds of screen time.
And I won't penalize you for it writer, but please do me a favor and look up the origins of the term "Indian Giver"...