A Minor by Liam Treacy - Short, Drama - A music teacher prepares for a competition whilst harbouring a dark secret. 12 pages - pdf, format

New writer interested in feedback on this work

A Minor + teacher + dark secret. When I read the title and logline, I knew what was coming. Tough subject to write about, which will be a road block for many readers.


"Eddie and his wife CHEER as they watch their son play
football." - You're introducing the wife, so it needs to be capitals.

I don't think you need all the capitals in this script. For eg: SCANS, CHEER, CONDUCTS, STARING, SCRUBS, Etc.

Maybe his wife's name is CHEER.

Hearing both sides of the argument, I don't capitalize any action unless it absolutely, positively, definitely needs to be in caps, and that's very rare I find.

Quoted from HyperMatt Hearing both sides of the argument, I don't capitalize any action unless it absolutely, positively, definitely needs to be in caps, and that's very rare I find.

While reading the script I only noticed one point of view. That of the perpetrator Eddie (by the way, this is also the name of my sister Gina's husband, who lives in Oklahoma, and is a shitty born again Christian woman.
My story shows the case from the point of view of the victim, the survivor of sexual abuse. It would also have been okay to tell the story from the point of view of the mother / wife, because most of the mothers know what happens, but are silent, out of fear, by a talking to destroy the "perfect world". As a survivor of sexual violence by my own father and uncle, I know that sex is only the tool. It's about violence and power. The perpetrators feel powerless, for whatever reason. and want to turn their powerlessness into power by abusing children.
In contrast to homosexuals and transsexuals, only a few were "born that way". Most of them consciously choose to rape children. It may be that they are also ill, but first and foremost, these people are perpetrators, not victims. Understanding perpetrators means once again raping and taunting the victims.