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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Unproduced Screenplay Discussion    Short Horror  ›  The Chair
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  Author    The Chair  (currently 353 views)
Don
Posted: October 24th, 2021, 9:10am Report to Moderator
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So, what are you writing?

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The Chair by Rob Herzog - Short, Horror - A woman purchases a used chair and gets tangled in a monstrous curse. 5 pages - pdf format

Writer interested in feedback on this work



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Yuvraj
Posted: October 24th, 2021, 9:49am Report to Moderator
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Hi Rob,

It is a good imaginative piece with gritty visuals. Story-wise, I feel it follows the typical horror story trope. It was a decent quick read, imo.

Good luck.


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AlexanderLR
Posted: October 25th, 2021, 6:15am Report to Moderator
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Very interesting and unusual concept which is great. Just one little thing...

Maybe instead of...

           INT. HALLWAY - NIGHT (TWO DAYS LATER)

perhaps you could put...

           INT. HALLWAY - NIGHT

SUPER: TWO DAYS LATER

Otherwise, very well done. My favourite parts were 'she extends the sharp part used to remove toe jam' and 'her lips are trapped in an eternal snarl'.
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Rob
Posted: October 27th, 2021, 5:57pm Report to Moderator
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Quick update: "The Chair" has been sold. It is no longer available for production. Thank you to AlexanderLR and Yuvraj for your comments.
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LC
Posted: October 27th, 2021, 7:38pm Report to Moderator
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Congrats, Rob!
So fast!

I read it the other day. Very creepy script. I especially liked the way it continued in a dastardly loop.

Gotta be careful buying things online.
Never know whatcha' gonna get.


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Yuvraj
Posted: October 28th, 2021, 3:23am Report to Moderator
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Quoted from Rob
Quick update: "The Chair" has been sold. It is no longer available for production. Thank you to AlexanderLR and Yuvraj for your comments.


Terrific, Rob!! It was an entertaining read.



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AlexanderLR
Posted: October 28th, 2021, 5:08am Report to Moderator
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No problem. Well done.
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