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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Unproduced Screenplay Discussion    Western Scripts  ›  New York City Cowboys Moderators: bert
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Don
Posted: April 24th, 2015, 5:23pm Report to Moderator
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So, what are you writing?

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New York City Cowboys by John Schamus - Western - In 1917 a young Jew, born in the city, raised on a ranch in Colorado, returns to New York where he has to deal with gangsters, bank robbers and anti-Semitism while working as an extra on a Douglas Fairbanks, Sr. Western filmed in New Jersey. 115 pages - pdf, format


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You will miss 100% of the shots you don't take.
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Don  -  July 18th, 2015, 4:18pm
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AdamV
Posted: April 28th, 2015, 7:04pm Report to Moderator
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From reading it, i get the impression you have a passion for westerns...Its very well formatted IMO. The dialogue is believeable...all in all it seems quite professional
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Jay
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Thanks.  I did get a 6/10 score for this script and at first I was disappointed, but after reading the write up I was a little more encouraged.  The reviewer was obviously a professor and really seemed to like the story and main character, but I needed to work on some other areas. such as dialing Douglas Fairbanks down a notch or three. I took his score as encouragement to actually fix the script. If I had gotten even a 7 I would have probably made some cosmetic changes and coasted.  Now I'm in the middle of an extensive rewrite and if that was what he was ttrying to motivate me to, do it worked.  

This whole exercise has gotten me thinking about what is wrong with Westerns nowadays but that discussion is for another night and the other forum.  
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