SimplyScripts Discussion Board
Blog Home - Produced Movie Script Library - TV Scripts - Unproduced Scripts - Contact - Site Map
ScriptSearch
Welcome, Guest.
It is May 26th, 2019, 11:35am
Please login or register.
Was PortalRecent PostsHome Help Calendar Search Register Login
If you wish to join this discussion board, please send me a message. Please do read the guidelines that govern behavior on the discussion board. It will make for a much more pleasant experience for everyone. A word about SimplyScripts and Censorship


Scripts Studios are posting for award consideration
The Writers' Tournament is back...


The Beginners Guide to the SimplyScripts Discussion Board (WIP)


Yes, I am running script reviews, again...

Short Script of the Day | Featured Script of the Month | Featured Short Scripts Available for Production | Submit Your Script

How do I get my film's link and banner here?
All screenplays on the simplyscripts.com and simplyscripts.net domain are copyrighted to their respective authors. All rights reserved. This screenplaymay not be used or reproduced for any purpose including educational purposes without the expressed written permission of the author.
Forum Login
Username: Create a new Account
Password:     Forgot Password

SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Unproduced Screenplay Discussion    Horror Scripts  ›  Cutter's Road Moderators: bert
Users Browsing Forum
No Members and 2 Guests

 Pages: 1
Recommend Print
  Author    Cutter's Road  (currently 1530 views)
Don
Posted: September 21st, 2008, 7:57pm Report to Moderator
Administrator
Administrator


So, what are you writing?

Location
Virginia
Posts
12993
Posts Per Day
1.94
Cutter's Road by David L Jackson - Horror - The wrongs of Arnold Cutter created a legend, a legend that has been revisited 36 years later when a group of college kids heading for a beach party travel down highway 36...once known as Cutter's Road. 69 pages - rtf, format


Visit SimplyScripts.com for what is new on the site.


-------------
You will miss 100% of the shots you don't take.
- Wayne Gretzky
Logged
Site Private Message
JackAction
Posted: September 26th, 2008, 12:49pm Report to Moderator
New-ish



Posts
11
Posts Per Day
0.00
Thanks for posting my script, I know it needs some aspects fixed up a bit, but it was my very first project. I start so many great ideas into screenplays, but never finish, I'm hoping that now that I have somewhere to go to inspire me to finish what I start...I'll have more to post here.
To fill you in on my bio, I am 38 years old, a factory worker from Canada who has been using my creative edge to write and produce stories just as recently as 2007.
I wrote, filmed and produced a short commercial for an online contest for a local advertiser, and won...I had so much fun doing it, I went straight to work on writing and filming a short action/suspence film which was showcased and premiered at STFF in October 2007. I was able to attend, they had me up on stage for an interview and all in all it was a great time. I wrote another short and just finished it in July...It was accepted to STFF again for this October and I plan on going again.
I was invited to work on set of a major feature film project August of 2008 for 5 weeks as a Unit Manager and it really inspired me to finish one of my longer projects...thus Cutter's Road. I have never had any schooling on this writing stuff, but I am learning and hope to hear back from you readers any feedback that may help me become better at this.
Oh and I know some of you may want to know...the feature film I worked on this summer is "Silent But Deadly" starring Jason Mewes, William Sadler, Patrick McKenna and Kim Poirer to name a few. A slasher/comedy due for release in early 2009.
Anyway, Thanks for having me here and I'm looking forward to reading and writing along side all of you.
Cheers!
Logged Offline
Private Message Reply: 1 - 8
NME
Posted: October 3rd, 2008, 1:23pm Report to Moderator
New-ish



Posts
5
Posts Per Day
0.00
Hey Jack,

I am new to scriptwritting and was wondering what format you used? It looks like the format that was loaded would be the producers script. Is that was it is.
Logged Offline
Private Message Reply: 2 - 8
JackAction
Posted: October 3rd, 2008, 11:48pm Report to Moderator
New-ish



Posts
11
Posts Per Day
0.00
This format was simply a Microsoft Word Program saved as a DOC file, I just got FINAL DRAFT 7 installed last month so I have since reformatted it.

I am probably not the one to ask about formatting as I too am just starting out as a screenwriter myself.
My only suggestion is that you find a writing program you are comfortable using and adapt. The net is a great sourse of information...lol.
Write it, protect it and get it out there I guess.
Logged Offline
Private Message Reply: 3 - 8
Busy Little Bee
Posted: October 4th, 2008, 9:46am Report to Moderator
Been around a while



Location
San Antonio, TX
Posts
325
Posts Per Day
0.07

You guys, please, if you want to do yourself a favor, read and review others scripts. Not only will it get others to read your script, but also it's one of the best ways to learn about scripts from reading them.


You may think because your newbies or whatever you have nothing to offer, I still consider myself a newbie, but you guys like movies and stories therefore your input is valuable, get it out there.


JackAction, I'm going to give this a read. I've already took a look at the format and most would be turned of by it immediately. I suggest getting some screenwritng software (Final Draft, Screenwriter Magic, etc...) that'll put your writing in proper format.



Bee




Commodus: But the Emperor Claudius knew that they were up to something. He knew they were busy little bees. And one night he sat down with one of them and he looked at her and he said, "Tell me what you have been doing, busy little bee..."
Logged Offline
Private Message Reply: 4 - 8
JackAction
Posted: October 4th, 2008, 7:55pm Report to Moderator
New-ish



Posts
11
Posts Per Day
0.00
Yes I agree, I am reading a couple already, I will comment as I finish them.
Logged Offline
Private Message Reply: 5 - 8
Busy Little Bee
Posted: October 7th, 2008, 7:28pm Report to Moderator
Been around a while



Location
San Antonio, TX
Posts
325
Posts Per Day
0.07
Hey Jack

First, congrats on finishing your first script. To me that task always deserved a pat on the back. And I think just getting through it will help tremendously on more drafts and other stories.

So, I got around to reading your script today. Not going to spend much time on the obvious, formatting, misspelled words things like that, just the story.



My favorite parts of the story were how you connected the crime in the past, the death of Arnold Cutter to the present. Iím not in totally agreement in how you did it but I liked that it was there. Along that note I also liked that from the first attack with the olí truck till the reveal of what was going on, I wasnít quite sure if it was a ghost or paranormal things of sorts or an actual person attacking. Left me wondering.


The other thing I liked was the opening with the three girls, Kelly, Melissa and Chara. I liked their interaction. And usually you get a female character from the city that loathes moving out to the country, so I like the flip where Kelly from California is excited about the prospect of the country. The thing that I thought worked best in this scene, because there was plenty of exposition, but the BEAT, Chara has to pee and Melissa teasing her.


This leads me to one of my problems. I thought things like that fell to the way side as the story went on especially toward the end. I donít know if you were trying to be funny or what, but I didnít like any of the dialogue between Cindy and Sheriff Michaels when he comes back into the story. The way he brings up what happened to him, the way he brings up the feds, he talks about them like every other cop in every other movie.



Continued...


Commodus: But the Emperor Claudius knew that they were up to something. He knew they were busy little bees. And one night he sat down with one of them and he looked at her and he said, "Tell me what you have been doing, busy little bee..."
Logged Offline
Private Message Reply: 6 - 8
Busy Little Bee
Posted: October 7th, 2008, 7:31pm Report to Moderator
Been around a while



Location
San Antonio, TX
Posts
325
Posts Per Day
0.07


Another problem presented itself when as I mentioned I wasnít sure if it was a paranormal or normal personal doing the attacking. When it was revealed who it was I didnít even have a problem with who it was. It just that the flip was so contrived especially the Deputy and then the mother Ginger her dialogue when she has the knife threatening Cindy. It wasnít the n bombs either. It's, how can I put this. It was like even though they appear to be people on the screen Ginger and her son, they might as well been monsters, like Jason or Michael Myers, so when you try to give them their motive contrasted with that it was like what? It was like you just tacked that on.
  

Donít get me wrong I like that the theme and overall crime here is prejudice, racism and injustice. I read another script, The A.T (check it out), it was about lesbian and two killers rage against lesbian. And even though I understand that you and the writer of The A.T were trying to make a point it doesnít work well when the opposition is totally incompetent and irrational. What would be more frightening is a thinking character who has these views. And a twisted misunderstanding that allows them to commit such heinous acts.


Also, it would add to the plot which is lacking here, you hit the exact same beat with the three girls than you go back and add Cindy and her group. But thatís a problem based on how you got the opposition setup like the road is the arena. I think what would add to the plot would be if the three girls while driving not only pass but diss a hitchhiker, than a little down the road they are attacked and what you had than the strangers comes back with his disposition and interacts with the girls. Because I also think that you need to spend a little more time literally on Cutterís road, because again thatís the arena, well at first at least.


Last two things: why is it that the men beating on Arnold Cutter are labeled Ďthugsí? I saw that and was like what? Huh? Also, you mentioned that these men where African-American, which was necessary considering the context. But when he flash to the future thereís not mention of who else is African-American or ethnic for that matter I didnít figure that out till the latter part of the story. And I think considering the context itís necessary that you mention who is.


After I found out Cindy was black I wondered if any of Kelly, Melissa or Chara were. But, good luck on the next one, hope to be here more from you.


Bee



Commodus: But the Emperor Claudius knew that they were up to something. He knew they were busy little bees. And one night he sat down with one of them and he looked at her and he said, "Tell me what you have been doing, busy little bee..."
Logged Offline
Private Message Reply: 7 - 8
JackAction
Posted: October 8th, 2008, 3:36pm Report to Moderator
New-ish



Posts
11
Posts Per Day
0.00
Thanks so much for the review, you probably don't realize how much help you just gave me.

I wrote this script with a mindset of just how wrong racism and hatred is and how nothing good ever comes of it...maybe I jumped a little too much to keep it all in structure...It was challenging to say the least.

I am writing a sci-fi thriller right now, an infestation invasion of an alien parasite which turns out to be a designed weapon against mankind...I'll keep all your notes handy.
Thanks again.
Logged Offline
Private Message Reply: 8 - 8
 Pages: 1
Recommend Print

Locked Board Board Index    Horror Scripts  [ previous | next ] Switch to:
Was Portal Recent Posts Home Help Calendar Search Register Login

Forum Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post polls
You may not post attachments
HTML is on
Blah Code is on
Smilies are on


Powered by E-Blah Platinum 9.71B © 2001-2006