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Yule Tied by Rex Perkins - Drama, Family - Two of the most unlikely heroes of Christmas are magically chained together as they journey to rescue kidnapped children and wind up leading a revolution. 125 pages - pdf, format
�Yule Tied� is a fairy tale adventure written along the lines of �Rise of the Guardians� and �Stardust.� Belsnickel, a war veteran, searches the German countryside for his murdered friend�s twins he swore to protect. When he enters a deserted village, he encounters a demonic tourist whom he fails to exorcize, cursing them both to be permanently shackled together. After a skirmish with soldiers at a checkpoint, Belsnickel learns the kids are at the castle of a witch who collects children from around the world, and the Count who murdered their father; the man he failed to kill years before. A supernatural wolf chases Belsnickel and Krampus to a portal between worlds where hellish apparitions nearly finish them off. They manage to escape without being crushed and scale a cliff in the Alps where a beautiful gypsy informs Belsnickel of the witch�s plans for Yuletide. Plans that include bringing to life an army of giant toy soldiers using the hearts of condemned men and the power of the winter solstice. Dogged by the wolf, with a price on their heads and a wily highwayman in the way, Belsnickel and Krampus must learn to work together to infiltrate the castle before the children are silenced in the night.
Some good ideas here, and the concept is intriguing. I would work on your synopsis above and some of the dialogue seems on the nose. You also have some grammatical and capitalization errors. This is a great effort to reach 125 pages, which is slightly on the long side.
I got 10 pages in and its well written, but not for me. You have formatting down pretty well imo.