Pounding Sand by 0 - Short, Drama - A taxi driver is crushed by his own relationship with his taxi. Sometimes you just can't get out from under things.  - pdf, format

I liked the ending, but I didn't feel it really suited the body of the script. It's because it lacked dramatic irony.

If the story was about feeling trapped in his job, then he does something wild, like the robbery, then buys a new car, then gets trapped like that....it has a sense of irony. He tried to be free to buy his car, and ends up trapped by it.

As it was it was about an alcoholic, who just gets trapped on a beach for no particular reason.

It had good tone, good atmosphere and was reasonably well written, despite many typos...but the whole of it just didn't quite hang together.

Good effort, though.

I couldn't find an actual story here. I can see that Rick couldn't either.

A pass from me.

Kind of trapped outside a cab rather than in one.

Anyway - just didn't resonate with me. It was not particularly thought provoking and all losers - no winners. I will give it another read later

Seriously...misspelling your title page...let me check

The INT/EXt doesn't work

Ok as. Go on a few format issues here like the lack of caps in a title. I don't have time to go through in details but may be we could afterwards

As we cut to multiple scenes I think you'll find the film makers don't this this low budget

Yeah, not low budget.

Didn't get into it, but there is some thing about the self destructive gene that provides compelling drama. Here was too much one way. He drank, then drank again etc

Fair effort but a

Pass

Whew! Rush job I'm guessing by the amount of typos.

That said dialogue was good and characterisation. A germ of a good idea here that ran aground (lil pun) in the end but you should rethink the story and put it up again after the challenge. The character and circumstance is good. Trapped? For a bit, yep.

Pass this time around but you could definitely develop this character and story. Underdogs are always good fodder.

A few too many typos suggest a rush to get this in -- misspelling your title page rarely gives out a good impression going into a read but not a deal breaker for me.  Story-wise I do like the idea of a guy meeting this grim demise trapped in or beneath a cab as the tide comes in -- that’s got potential.  With that said I think you need to build to this with a degree more sophistication.  Nick’s feels too throwaway.  All we know is he’s a mean drunk with debts.  I’d think about dialing back the crash and giving us more story/character to give this a more satisfying conclusion.

A decent idea, not quite enough meat on the bone to be as effective as it could be.

Oh boy...

Misspelling the title?  Misspellings all over the place.  Very poor.  I'm out.

Grade - F

The ending with the sand was good but the rest of it seemed rushed to me... which of course most are, but there's a lot of typos and such.

Wasn't badly written but didn't really float my boat.

The log gives the ending away straight up lol.

Read a bit like a Stephen King short as I knew how it was gonna end. The typos didn't bother me and the spartan action lines moved it pretty well.

I kind of dug it. Give it a consider with a decent rewrite and, obviously a gram check

There's typos which can be fixed but the story seems rushed.  He does things, cusses a lot, then gets trapped outside the cab and suffocated by sand.  Not much there just stuff happening.  Not really a story but events for a story.  At least it's a start.  Keep going with it and change it to a story, then who knows.

Pretty dark, atmospherically gloomy as hell. I liked it as an idea, but you definitely need to work on that ending. Also typos all over the shop, need to sort them out, possibly this was rushed through last minute?

Anyway, I liked it but it definitely needs refinement and tweaking

Nick a scrawny ugly little angry man - a bit too much description for me) You really seem to hate that Nick.
It's hard to root for him. But who else here to root for otherwise?
I want to root for someone. Or something. To feel for the idea of the script.
This way I would follow the story.
Otherwise my mind is elsewhere as I read it.

I wish there was more of the story. Either that or I'm missing something.

Some notes.

The ending needs a better setup,  We need a reason for Nick to not go home.  We need a hint of why he needs the beach.  In any case, save the ending.  

Best
Richard

Wrong Title spelling ??? oops

In fact there's a LOT of misspelled words, but it is the OWC... Just fix them on the rewrite

A lot of Whiskey/Whisky drinking depending on the different ways you spelled it... lol
A guy with a bad  attitude all the way through, then getting I guess what he deserved at the end. I kind of wanted him to die lol

Overall not bad

Good job on entering