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Heavy Metal Labyrinth by Jake Katalay - Drama, Dark Comedy - A SWAT officer named Victor Rourke is trapped in a hellish place called the Heavy Metal Labyrinth, with no idea where he is, and how to escape. He must depend on two other people trapped inside, and weapons to survive. 94 pages - pdf, format
INT. THE JACKAL FUNHOUSE - REYMUS’ HEAVY METAL LABYRINTH
Not a proper heading - no time (DAY, NIGHT) indicated.
Quoted Text
The Jackal Funhouse is crude looking. There’s spray painting and wood furniture everywhere. The entire funhouse is made from wood. It’s pretty old and croaky. It could fall apart any minute.
Don't need to mention the Jackal House - it's already in your heading. You could simply open with Crude looking.
Quoted Text
There’s puzzles, teddy bears, and children toys laying around. A man is buried in colorful alphabet blocks. He has several tatts on his arms, and one on his neck. He looks husky and hardened. He’s wearing short sleeve SWAT Riot armor. There’s a trickle of blood drooling from his mouth. His name is Victor ROURKE, late 30’s
Should be They're - not There's. Not needed in either case though.
Keep all your writing in 12pt, Courier font. The crazy-font-sizes-like-Max-Landis is an irritating gimmick. It makes your writing more difficult to read. Unlearn that habit, I fear it's going to alienate more readers than it will win over.
And please reciprocate with feedback on this forum. As you may remember, lack of reciprocation is why I shut down my old forum and sought an alternative (two big thumbs up for SimplyScripts!).