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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Unproduced Screenplay Discussion    Short Comedy Scripts  ›  N V. N
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Don
Posted: December 23rd, 2018, 7:59pm Report to Moderator
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So, what are you writing?

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N V. N by Kyle Amos - Short, Comedy - The great debate on the N-word. 4 pages - pdf format

Writer interested in feedback on this work



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DustinBowcot
Posted: December 24th, 2018, 1:25pm Report to Moderator
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The word nigger was never defined as 'inferior', it is merely a shade of brown that more closely resembles the skin colour of a black person than 'black' does. I remember buying nigger wool for my mother in the 80s. Nigger is simply a shade of brown and no worse than calling somebody black or white.

The negative connotations do not come from the word but rather the social status of most black people of the times. Whether the word was nigger or black, it isn't the word that makes a difference but the attitude behind those words. Changing the word changes nothing, it just puts a bandage over the infection rather than treating the problem.
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khamanna
Posted: December 24th, 2018, 11:50pm Report to Moderator
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I liked the beginning of it - that was funny and leading somewhere. But then it changed direction and never returned to the original discussion.
What it's lacking is an entertainment value - I think it's because of the sudden switch and the fact that it got preachy at some point for me.
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eldave1
Posted: December 25th, 2018, 2:11pm Report to Moderator
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Quoted from khamanna
I liked the beginning of it - that was funny and leading somewhere. But then it changed direction and never returned to the original discussion.
What it's lacking is an entertainment value - I think it's because of the sudden switch and the fact that it got preachy at some point for me.


Very similar reaction for me.  Found myself engaged early on - but that waned towards the end. Did like the writing for the most part.


My Scripts can all be seen here:

http://dlambertson.wix.com/scripts
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