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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Discussion of...     General Chat  ›  Unrelated by P. Cook - Filmed Moderators: bert
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  Author    Unrelated by P. Cook - Filmed  (currently 423 views)
Don
Posted: June 14th, 2021, 8:57am Report to Moderator
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So, what are you writing?

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Unrelated (5 page comedy)

A young man's dream of getting married is ruined by his father, but saved by his mother.







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-------------
You will miss 100% of the shots you don't take.
- Wayne Gretzky

Revision History (1 edits)
Don  -  June 14th, 2021, 5:38pm
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Zack
Posted: June 14th, 2021, 11:11am Report to Moderator
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Don't get it right. Get it written.

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Ha! Funny stuff! Didn't see that ending coming. Congrats on getting it filmed, Pia. Turned out great!


WITCH HUNT - horror, 77 pgs

GOODBYE - drama, 4 pgs

HERE COMES THE BOGEYMAN - horror, 24 pgs
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eldave1
Posted: June 14th, 2021, 11:37am Report to Moderator
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Hmm.

Okay - I effing love the premise of this.

The actors were really miscast age-wise - I didn't believe for a minute that those were parents. Kind of messed it up for me.

Should have ended with the wink from Mom.

Don't recall having read this - but - man what a fantastic premise and twist - very clever. I could seriously see a feature here.



My Scripts can all be seen here:

http://dlambertson.wix.com/scripts
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Grandma Bear
Posted: June 14th, 2021, 11:56am Report to Moderator
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This was a student project that I just happened to come across while searching for the same film made by a different director. She had my permission, just never told me about the film. She missed the punchline at the end, so I've asked Don to post the script again in case someone wants to compare.


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eldave1
Posted: June 14th, 2021, 12:08pm Report to Moderator
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Quoted from Grandma Bear
This was a student project that I just happened to come across while searching for the same film made by a different director. She had my permission, just never told me about the film. She missed the punchline at the end, so I've asked Don to post the script again in case someone wants to compare.


cool - I will look for it


My Scripts can all be seen here:

http://dlambertson.wix.com/scripts
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Zack
Posted: June 14th, 2021, 12:20pm Report to Moderator
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Don't get it right. Get it written.

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Damn, I thought this version was pretty good. Interested in reading the script as well.


WITCH HUNT - horror, 77 pgs

GOODBYE - drama, 4 pgs

HERE COMES THE BOGEYMAN - horror, 24 pgs
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Yuvraj
Posted: June 14th, 2021, 1:23pm Report to Moderator
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This was dope, Pia! Amazing little story!


Most recent script: The Menacing- short
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Grandma Bear
Posted: June 14th, 2021, 7:48pm Report to Moderator
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Thanks!  

Don just added the script to this thread.  


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eldave1
Posted: June 14th, 2021, 9:12pm Report to Moderator
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Quoted from Grandma Bear
Thanks!  

Don just added the script to this thread.  


Yep - you ended it with the wink from Mom - perfect!!!

The filmmaker stepped on your impeccable timing IMO - oh well,


My Scripts can all be seen here:

http://dlambertson.wix.com/scripts
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Zack
Posted: June 14th, 2021, 9:21pm Report to Moderator
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Don't get it right. Get it written.

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Agreed. Script's ending is better.


WITCH HUNT - horror, 77 pgs

GOODBYE - drama, 4 pgs

HERE COMES THE BOGEYMAN - horror, 24 pgs
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Robert Timsah
Posted: June 15th, 2021, 9:50pm Report to Moderator
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Story Is Structure

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That was cute, and well done.


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LC
Posted: June 16th, 2021, 2:11am Report to Moderator
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I think I remember reading this going back a bit, Pia.

Really clever. Did not see that twist coming.
They did a nice job on this. I personally might have cast the dad as a teeny bit older, but minor quibble.


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StevenSallie
Posted: June 16th, 2021, 9:23pm Report to Moderator
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Okay, that was funny as hell. So jealous I didn't think of it. Good job! This was great.
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MarkRenshaw
Posted: June 23rd, 2021, 6:33pm Report to Moderator
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Well done on getting this filmed!


For more of my scripts, stories, produced movies and the ocassional blog, check out my new website. CLICK
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