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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board  /  Short Scripts  /  Arkham Asylum
Posted by: Don, April 9th, 2005, 7:48am
Arkham Asylum by Michael Cornell - Short, Drama - Frank Vernon is new to Gotham city. And his new job. interviewing inmates at the most dangerous asylum on the planet. His first nut. Edward Nygma, The Riddler - pdf, format 8)
Posted by: ChipPollo, March 5th, 2006, 4:19pm; Reply: 1
I read this one last night but didn't get a chance to comment on it until today. First off, I wanna say I enjoyed this. It kept me reading. Was the Riddler being sarcastic when he said he had never realised his name sounded like Enigma? Also, the dialogue directly after there seems a little unnatural in a few spots. The guy telling the Riddler to stop being so annoyed seemed out of place to me. I'm looking forward to the next one. Zsasz is a very interesting character. Keep up the good work
Posted by: ChipPollo, March 5th, 2006, 4:32pm; Reply: 2
Also, I noticed the way you wrote it they don't say much to each other. A few sentances usually back and forth. Do you intend for the dialogue to be delivered at kind of a fast pace kind Howard Hawks style?
Posted by: Helio, March 6th, 2006, 8:07am; Reply: 3
Hi Michael, I realy did'nt read all your script, just 15 pages. It had too much dialogues and I think it is not for Radio, but for film. I'm sorry. I hope to find other script by you in order to read.
Posted by: TheUsualSuspect, April 19th, 2006, 11:18pm; Reply: 4
I surprisingly enjoyed this very much. I look forward to more additions.
Posted by: dogglebe (Guest), April 20th, 2006, 1:12pm; Reply: 5
I don't understand this script at all, Mike.  What is Frank supposed to be doing at Arkham?  His questions lack any sense of direction.  They were like questions a cub reporter might have asked.

In regards to the Riddler's character, I don't think you caught it.  He always had a bit of an ego; I can't see him answering such pedestrian questions from such a dullard as Frank.  He gave in too easily to Riddler's command to call him Riddler.  Health care professionals wouldn't do that; it only reinforces the patients' problems.

BTW, did you name him Frank after Frank Gorshin?  Just wondering....

I've never understood why the Riddler belonged in Arkham.  He's not crazy.  Having a little OCD is not reason enough to put him in an institution.


Phil
Posted by: zer00, May 10th, 2007, 3:41pm; Reply: 6
Frank was taken from Frank gorshin and Vernon was taken from...Mount Vernon.

Quoted from ChipPollo
I read this one last night but didn't get a chance to comment on it until today. First off, I wanna say I enjoyed this. It kept me reading. Was the Riddler being sarcastic when he said he had never realised his name sounded like Enigma? Also, the dialogue directly after there seems a little unnatural in a few spots. The guy telling the Riddler to stop being so annoyed seemed out of place to me. I'm looking forward to the next one. Zsasz is a very interesting character. Keep up the good work


Sarcastic he was being.

I know it felt a little unnatural. I never got around to writing a second draft of it. I wrote it all on the fly in one sitting. I'm still planning to do another rewrite and then write episode 2.


Quoted from ChipPollo
Also, I noticed the way you wrote it they don't say much to each other. A few sentances usually back and forth. Do you intend for the dialogue to be delivered at kind of a fast pace kind Howard Hawks style?


Yeah I usually enjoy fast back and forth dialogue, I don't always write it that way but if I can come up with a good reason why it should be there I'll get it in. And I thought it just added to the sense of unpredictability.
Posted by: dogglebe (Guest), May 10th, 2007, 5:58pm; Reply: 7
Let me see if I got this right, Mike.  You upload a script two years ago and finally come around to posting something?  And it's about your script?

Read some scripts here and review them.  That's how this site works.  Read scripts from those who reviewed your script.  That'd be a nice gesture of appreciation.



Phil
Posted by: zer00, June 29th, 2008, 2:21am; Reply: 8
I actually have posted way more than once(twice counting this)

I just don't get around here very often...if at all

And some people are very busy, and move a lot, and are poor. So don't judge
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