Empty House by Julian Singleton - Short, Horror -  An extremely short script about two friends who explore a violently haunted house that won't let them go. - fdr, format 8)

Two problems with this script (and the first is extremely easy to fix).

First, you shouldn't post a script here in Final Draft.  Not everyone has thtis software and, without it, you can't open it and read it.  Save the file as a .rtf file and resubmit it.

Second, (spoilers ahead), it was too short with no development whatsoever.  Two kids go into a haunted house.  They get chased by an evil.  They die.  The end.  There was no character development and no suspense.

Rewrite this story.  Make it atleast twenty-five pages long (yes, I said twenty-five).  But don't just make the chase longer.  Delve into the background of Dave and Gary.  Go into the history of the house.  Explain John a little bit.  Build some suspense.  



Phil