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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board  /  Horror Scripts  /  The Man in the Mirror
Posted by: Don, December 26th, 2005, 3:16pm
Man in the Mirror, The by Jason Pitts - Horror - April battles a ghost who can stalk his victims using mirrors. - htm, format 8)
Posted by: jpitts, December 27th, 2005, 11:22am; Reply: 1
Hey Bert,

   Thanks for the comments.  I just wanted to say that I think the story is a little more scary and believable if it is a little illogical.  The idea of someone using reflections to stalk his victims is quite illogical in itself, so it would be logical if some of the events in the script are illogical.   By the end of the script, I want the viewer/reader to question which parts were in reality and which parts were actually in the mirror world.  As far as not explaining Jeffory's power..if you explain to much, I believe that the story or monster is less scary.  In the original "Nightmare on Elm Street" Wes Craven explains virtually nothing about Freddy, and he is one scary mother.  We don't find out about the dream demons until part 6.
  I agree with you about Rod being a little over the top.  I may change him a bit, but I kinda like loose cannon characters,  they keep the audience on edge.

Thanks for your comments
Posted by: Zombie Sean, January 1st, 2006, 5:02am; Reply: 2
Okay I am on page 45 right now and so far it is awesome. Great job. I'm going to read the rest later today because I am extremely tired and I really want to go to bed. This is a great script by the way *Get paranoid when looking at mirror*
Posted by: Zombie Sean, January 1st, 2006, 2:20pm; Reply: 3
Okay just got done reading and I have to say this was a great script. I liked the characters and everything, and the plot reminded me of the Nightmare On Elm Street movies, just instead of someone stalking people in their dreams, he stalks people in their reflections.

Though there were some minor errors in the script, but I'm just going to be brief about it.

You accidentally mixed up some characteres names, and it kind of confused me and I had to move the names around to fit which character said what, if you know what I mean. Like:

                                         ADAM
                         Obviously you didn't kill him good
                         enough.  How did he get into the
                         mirrors, dad?

I'm guessing that is supposed to be "April".

The dialogue was a little weak in some part, I must say. But with all the horror movies coming out, the dialogue is a little cheesy at most parts.

But overall this was an awesome script and the way you described it was perfect. I was actually able to imagine the stuff you described in my mind and I thought it was incredible. Keep up the good work.
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