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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board  /  Horror Scripts  /  The Devil's Orchard
Posted by: Don, June 3rd, 2007, 11:01am
The Devil's Orchard by Matt Thompson - Horror - After 16-year-old Sarah announces her pregnancy to her closest friends, they decide to take her on one last scary adventure -- to visit the black angel statue of a dead nun.  But when those in the group start dying, Sarah must discover who is doing this and why. - pdf, format 8)
Posted by: Busy Little Bee, June 14th, 2007, 4:49pm; Reply: 1
Noticed no ones took the liberty of reviewing your script so, here I am!

Pregnancy, dead nun, "The Devil's Orchard"... sounds Biblical and intriguing enough for me to take a look. I'm already curious to what I'll be gettin' into, is it a slasher, supernatural, both... how will it separate itself from the likes of stories as The Omen, Rosemary's Baby, Bless the Child...

Should have a review up in a day or two, so like Sarah be EXPECTING.


Posted by: Busy Little Bee, June 18th, 2007, 2:45pm; Reply: 2

The Review... Possible Spoilers...

  The Devil’s Orchard is a horror well paced, with an attack by a dog after trespassing, creepy visions, a car crash; death of a lover entangled with creepier visions of our hereon Sarah trapped in the coffin with her deceased loved one, every horror has at least one defining moment the better ones, two, and the classics several that stick with you, this is yours. When Sarah is trapped in that tight space and her Jason reaches for her is just a horrible scene played out in my mind. Too early for the worse of the worse, “a cart before the horse” maybe, but at least there was one. This is the only hiccup in the pacing I saw and though there’s a drop off from that the pacing of horrid events is still very good.

…Pages in we meet a likable couple in Sara & Jason, who only brighten up in dynamics when Erin’s best friend and Erin’s boyfriend join in on quick wit, zingers, and a good time between the four. I loved how even after death Jason was kept alive in spirit when their friend’s reminisced about him, and same for Erin after her death with subtleties. For most of the story I enjoyed all four characters Erin & Jason more so for the fact they didn’t live long enough to have that wit about them stripped away. I understand joking but in dyer circumstances like surviving you’re second car crash Michael would’ve acted more naturally, yet he with wit, it’s a clash of context to me is all. Given what happened. Sarah too.
  By the end of the story what started of as well created character dynamics, a story headed somewhere, with a Ghost, Character Needs, a desire the driver (or writer) losses sight of where he’s headed (suspension of reality), while still managing to hit the clutch at the right time, yet crashes never the less cause…

Motives? Sarah was willing to commit murder and Michael with out physical proof, but hear say by a ghost, a vengeful one non-the less. I think they should hold of till they’re given actual physical evidence that can allow them that leap to of believability that this ghost is on to something or/and is right and Nolan should get what's coming too him. And also I’m not sure who are heroes’ opponent in the beginning it’s the jester, the Nun Mary throughout and Mr. Nolan by the end. One thing that might clear this up is, explaining better if the jester is working on behalf of Mary which is what I thought, and didn’t see any reason not too. If Mary wants Sarah help why kill her friends, and why would Sarah or Michael help her after that. She was raped isn’t good enough when you’ve killed my best friend. If Mary isn’t working with the jester why doesn’t she protect the group of friends at least once? The father notices the scratch on her face but how did she bandaged her ankle, wasn’t it sliced, and a night before that she twisted it. I’m hopping I lost sight of the timeline and not the creator.

Before based on title and premise alone liked this story to Rosemary’s Baby & the Omen, but it plays more like Nightmare on Elm Street, a group of students haunted by a ghost of the past destroyed by its community. A fundamental difference between Nightmare and this is you know who the opponent is. Freddy!!!!







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