Print Topic

SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board  /  Drama Scripts  /  Brownsville
Posted by: Don, July 11th, 2009, 9:08am
Brownsville by Guy Jackson & Robert Hayes - Drama, Crime - John Harrison, a troubled young man growing up in one of the worst neighborhoods in Brooklyn, has his life change in an instant when his girlfriend tells him she's pregnant.  Underacheiving his whole life, John must now decide if he will accept his newly acquired responsibility or continue to live his life of drugs, crime, and mediocrity. 107 pages - pdf, format 8)
Posted by: robin millen, October 2nd, 2009, 4:47pm; Reply: 1
i read your script last night. i thought it was pretty good. i think you meant to write "through" and wrote "though" or something like that on the first page and also somewhere in there there was a "may" that was supposed to be something else like way or say or soemthing. There was a couple other things that spellchekc wouldnt have picked up...i didnt like that Tee was almighty like he rolls cee-lo and he schools everyone in ball and his goonies thought he was king shit. no hardbody dudes that dont even put down the ratchet to shoot jump shots are gonna respect or fear their boy like that. just my opinion. i thought that line like "of course he is he just got laid" didnt fit into a script the way you put it in. kinda takes you out of the script for a second. reminds you your reading you know. also i thought the sex scene wher you describe like "this aint no teenage dadada whatever whatever did the same thing. .. i thought it was pretty typical hood story but still had enough suspense and kept a good visual the whole time. i thought it was good.
Posted by: purplefilms, October 8th, 2009, 12:38pm; Reply: 2
Has this been produced?
Posted by: robdadon1 (Guest), October 9th, 2009, 10:52am; Reply: 3
No it hasn't been produced
Print page generated: March 19th, 2024, 3:03am