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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board  /  Short Scripts  /  Trail of the Wolf - A Babz WOL script
Posted by: Don, August 30th, 2010, 7:37pm
Trail of the Wolf by Ryan Lee (ryan1) - Short, Comedy - An expert werewolf hunter helps the Kent Police after an old lady gets devoured. 6 pages  A WOL script - pdf, format 8)
Posted by: Dreamscale (Guest), August 30th, 2010, 8:12pm; Reply: 1
Another Ryan Lee script!  Damn, dude, you're amazing!

There is some funny shit here for sure.  You did alot with theme, and I think it's successful.

I did see alot of issues within though.  Your SLUGS were not well done, some inconsistencies with them.  I think you'd want to CAP your werewolf's intro on page 5.  Little things like that - probably quickly written, so no big deal.

All in all, some funny dialogue and scenes.

Pretty good!
Posted by: ghost and_ghostie gal, August 31st, 2010, 12:45am; Reply: 2
Ryan,

You're making a name for yourself around here.  Congrats on being the winner of the "Werewolves Of London," challenge.  You have some pretty funny stuff going on in this little puppy.

So my hats off too you.

Ghostwriter
Posted by: grademan, August 31st, 2010, 7:53am; Reply: 3
Ryan,

Very good! I  liked how you deftly wove in the song snippets into the story. The characters had their own voices which is hard to do in any short. Intriquing story. Fun to read. You have a clever mind.

Gary

BTW, I kept hearing Duran Duran's "Hungry Like the Wolf" during the scene with Ethel. Weird.
Posted by: Dreamscale (Guest), August 31st, 2010, 11:48am; Reply: 4
Congrats, Ryan on the WOL WIN!

Nicely done, bud.
Posted by: Coding Herman, August 31st, 2010, 2:27pm; Reply: 5
Hey, Ryan.

Another script of yours, another one I loved.

Really well done. You fit the song in nicely. I wouldn't have known this is for the contest if you didn't put it in the title.


Herman
Posted by: Ryan1, August 31st, 2010, 3:44pm; Reply: 6
Thanks for the looks, guys.  This was a quick one.  I wrote this in a couple hours and submitted it to Babz the day after the challenge was announced.  Didn't actually think it would win.  Interesting little challenge having to weave those lyrics in there.

Thanks again to Babz.

Ryan
Posted by: jwent6688, September 1st, 2010, 6:00pm; Reply: 7
Good job winning Ryan. I gotta admit, I couldn't come up with anything to even remotely entertain this theme for days. Just gave up.

The fantastical story you've created here using the lyrics is good fun. I liked it. Ethel and the purina wolf chow as bait, awesome.

Good work

James
Posted by: Ryan1, September 2nd, 2010, 9:51pm; Reply: 8
Thanks, James.  

Just felt the song lent itself more to an over the top comedy than a dark drama.  

Gary,

You kept hearing Hungry like the Wolf in that Ethel scene?  Damm, that is weird.  ;)
Posted by: Electric Dreamer, October 1st, 2010, 6:24pm; Reply: 9
Hello Ryan,

Thanks for the upload, its an enjoyable read.
Comedy is a great vehicle for material that needs to be referential and jump around.
You picked up on that and concocted a furry romp!
Good on you.

I listened to Babz's podcast so I thought I would head over here.
So, what were your thoughts on the Pitchfest? Sounds interesting.

One question about the ending, were there any song references on the last page?
Thanks again for the nifty read! Look forward to more!

Regards,
E.D.
Posted by: Ryan1, October 1st, 2010, 6:45pm; Reply: 10
Dreamer,

Yeah, given how strange the lyrics are, I felt comedy was the only way to go with this one.  On the last page, there were no lyrics, I just had to wrap the story up.  Pitchfests sound like a great idea to me.  I couldn't make the latest one, so maybe next time.

Ryan
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