Killer Karma by Lynn DiDiano - Thriller - Two serial killers who each represent what the other hates, face off after a cat & mouse chase that leads to Florida. CAL LARSEN is 6'5", blonde and all male. FRANKIE ALLUCIA is a 4'10" female with dark eyes and a dark soul..who will best who?  113 pages - doc, format 8)

Hi Lynn I must that the idea at the beginning of this story kinda intrigues me enough to want to collab with you on this story. But I must say the dialog is almost horrible.
For example:

PG # 7
TOM
Better be good now Jackie. We don’t want thrown out on our ears now do we?


Its like you are missing words at time and most the time your words are missing spunk an or swagger. And sometimes you use the wrong words to say what you have to say.

With this said just work on that dialog and you may have something here.

Also simplify your logline. I mean I don't need to know the height weight class of your characters in your logline. Leave that for your story. Peace Vaproductions