Lab Infection by Sydell Strong - Horror - Lab technicians become sick after a schizophrenic medication goes wrong. 110 pages - pdf, format

Writer interested in feedback on this work

Is the author here?

Hey, Sydell

At first glance, for me, visually the narrative seems a bit wordy, as I read though I hardly notice, which is odd because nothing turns me off faster than blocks and blocks of narrative. This read smoothly, though.

This story doesn't open with the usually running start nor an explicit horror scene, you know a false-alarm, scare, urban legend, death none of the above. Time will tell whether that was the best decision.

You did establish your monster of the story, I'm assuming, in the zombie/prisoner and perhaps the doctors who created them.

It appears that Tia is the main character her, yet in thirty pages I haven't seen or heard that she's suffering from some character flaw other than rolling her eye, which I could assume meant she needs to learn to care for others, but this one gesture will not do. I know she's left New York for Utah, but why?

What's the desire? So, far only Dr. Moreno and Dr. Sherman have a desire in that they want to cure the dead or something to that the effect. Dr. Sherman even has a motive his wife passed and he's morning her death incorrectly and it allows him to allow Moreno to experiment on his inmate/patience. Dr.Sherman is more interesting for this story than Tia. Though, TIa is a pretty charming character at points as well as some of the other characters working the night shift. I'm interested to see how you connect Tia to the prison/zombies/Dr.

Is Tia just playing a victim? A normal person who stumbles into a horrific phenomenon? IMO that's fine as long as you deliberately did that. I have to finish reading the story to come to a more conclusive review, which I'm willing to do, but I want to make sure you're still active before I continue.