Blood Orchard by S.D. Hintz - Horror - Six-month-old triplets vanish a block from Coren Raines' house a day after he moves into town. Not only does he become an immediate suspect, he is forced to cover up incriminating evidence haunting his backyard. 155 pages - doc, format 8)

Just so you know  some things: your novels may in fact be good. I haven't read them.
Most folks 'round here will avoid a .doc format and will only look at pdf formats. Since this in Word, there's no reason why it can't be in pdf even if there might be a slight compression as a result.

I don't know if you're hanging around, but that endorsement page has to go. I don't care who loved the book this is a script we are talking about.

Adapting a book is fine, especially one you written. But a screenplay is something else. The alignment should be a certain way, the slugs, etc. Narrative lines should be consise and no more than four lines (and some even argue for three)

I didn't make it past page seven.

Glanced at this one out of curiosity, given D's comments above.  He is correct about that endorsement page, btw.

I think it is cool when an author adapts their work, but prose and script are two very different beasts, and this one is missing the mark.

Aside from formatting problems, Pritchard is way too over-the-top in your opening pages.  I am not sure how this played out in the book, but on-screen you have a scene that begs for subtle menace; instead your cop would come off as almost cartoonish were this played out as written.

And you also have the laptop blinking out the second the plug is pulled.  They don't do that.

Like D, page 7 is where I held off -- and ideally, you would trim this down to something below 120 pages, at most -- an "unwritten" cut-off for scripts, and Horror usually south of that, even.  With a little practice trimming your prose, you could probably accomplish that.

Is this author around for comments?