Switchblade by Sean Halket - Short, Horror - Natalie and Stephen are about to have a very bad night. - celtx, format 8)

For future reference, pdf format is the norm around here. Get yourself a free program, like celtx. It will format the script, and export it as a pdf. As for your script, couldn't read it. Will try again when get to a desktop.

Tried again. Has to unzip. Get Celtx, all I can tell you.

Hi Sean

Managed to open this but to be honest it didn't do a huge amount for me.

Format wise the advice given here is to avoid a few things in spec scripts and I suggest you review others on this site to see the differences. For example, your first words are We see. That's a no no. The following para starts with "suddenly". avoid the ly ending words . Finally, you use cut to a fair amount. Try to avoid this and just have scenes follow after each other.

SPOILERS

Sorry one last point and I don't mean to go on about format as it's not hard to fine tune and after that the story is key. You introduce the Shape as like a man. Why don't you just call him a man? If it is different then best make that clearer.

Story wise I didn't really get it. Who is the shape, why does he kill, why does he follow etc etc. If he is death, as the girl suggests, then why kill? Death doesn't kill in my book. Besides why would it need a knife then a gun etc

Not every point has to explained and I agree some mystery is useful, but this one didn't seem to add up. Having said that, is there potential in a revenge killer seeking to get back at two girls, the first he kills the second he tracks down to the funeral. Possibly, but this is very different to how this is written.

If it is meant to be supernatural it still, IMO, needs to be consistent. Eg if it has super powers, then why does it Lose a  fight to a girl, having beaten a man, who finishes it off with a shoe when a gun somehow didn't?

This is a good place to stick around, read, review and learn.

All the best.