L*M*A*O by Amadu Amaru - Short,  Comedy - Laughing My Ass Off. 24 pages - pdf, format 8)

Code JACK comes riding a sport BIKE.

Maybe there is a comma missing after 'comes'? Or, Jack comes while riding a sport bike? I'm still trying to figure out how he's accomplished this. Has he got his dick in the tail pipe while sliding his tongue down the handlebars?

Always put a space after punctuation like commas and full stops.

Code A very BEAUTIFUL GIRL jaunts by.SHE draws Jack’s ATTENTION as rides.

This is really bad. I'm guessing that English is not your first language. It will need to be improved. Read lots. You must be intelligent to learn two languages anyway, so give it time and you'll improve. Good luck.

it seemed to me as a series of jokes .. or rather a series of word playing themes. I could not understand what was going on..

The f uck did I just read? I honestly don't have much to say because none of this made sense. The formatting is beyond fixable, the writing is nonsensical, and the humor is totally lost on me. Seems like a series of poorly constructed puns.

I'm guessing that English isn't your first language. Maybe the jokes just don't translate.

Like the others have said, the writing is pretty bad and nothing here makes sense. I chuckled a few times, but not for the right reasons. Some scenes are so bizarre and nonsensical they're funny in a weird way, and I don't think that's what you're going for.

The first thing you should do is work on your writing and format. It wouldn't matter if this did make sense... with writing like this it's almost unreadable and impossible to take seriously.

Sorry to be harsh. Learn some more about script format and work on grammar. There are some easy fixes here, and other things that may take some more work. Good luck man, and keep at it.

Will