Spinning by Richard Russell - Short, Drama - Everyone needs a best friend forever.  Jorga and Ester are precisely that. 24 pages - pdf, format 8)

Hi Richard - took a read, a few thoughts, just my opinion of course

1) 'She's as pretty as most girls on prom night.' - this seems a little bland and not really a filmable descrition.
2) Jorga, as a name given in 1954? Feels a little jarring and not sure it's important to the script.
3) Genital shaving in the early 70s at high school? It's a great conversation but that particular trend didn't really start till late 80s
4) I think a couple of Ester's dialoge sections are overlong.
5) Wasn't aware of what Greek paddles or a yenta was, thanks for them... am I meant to assume the girls are Jewish? (does it matter to the script, not sure).

Those were the bits as I went through that caught my eye as a little troubling... but in general I liked what you did with the relationship, the dialogue and their interaction Some really good writing here too, loved 'zoo keeper' for example.

The last gripe I have is the end,,, it was a little telegraphed for me, I wanted a twist, e.g. at the funeral Ester introduces her fiance... possibly even one of Jorga's exes.

Anyway, liked this, good work.

Anthony