Gourmet Recipe by Chris Beadnell - Short, Drama - He has few tomorrows left. Tonight his devoted wife is serving a meal meticulously prepared from special ingredients. 9 pages - pdf, format 8)

Chris,

Some notes.

For this one, I would say less is more.  I think you can pare this down and create more misdirection.  The lovey-dovey dialogue is a bit over the top.  There isn't a level of conflict that makes us want to watch.  I recognize that you try to fool us with his sudden inability to breathe, but that's not enough for me.

The policeman at the end isn't necessary.  Just have Sara find the bodies and find the note.  We don't need to know who she did it, only that she did.

Best
Richard

Thanks again Richard for reading the script and your feedback.

I am re-working the script slightly taking on board your points.

Gourmet Recipe has made the official selection for the January Los Angeles CineFest screenplay competition which has certainly given me a buzz. Shows that I have something to work with and hopefully improve upon when I re-write it.

Thanks again for your valuable input, on this, and all my other scripts submitted here.