The Seamstress by 0 - Short, Comedy - When one superhero hangs up his boots, another must fill them.  But this can never happen without the approval of...THE SEAMSTRESS! 6 pages - pdf, format 8)

Humm, not sure.

I quite like the actors sparring with each other. Something in that. The seamstress and clothing, not sure.

If you were interested I'd almost take out the superhero and just have them argue over lunch.

Good idea with a couple of funny lines.

3 laughs out of 10

Writer,

Not bad. But this just never really takes off. You had some witty banter going on between the three men. It was good, but could've used something more. Good use of the L and the bidet, and the leasing of the store. It just doesn't carry the script though.

Steve

Nice. Clean and straight forward. I like the use of the actors and their interaction with the Seamstress.
Also want to mention that I like they way you handle sound. "DING". "SNIKT". it works. It's all I need.

The Seamstress has all the attitude of the Seamstress in the Incredibles... maybe thats what you were going for.

Good dialogue back and forth.

overall pretty funny in places.

good job on entering

Interesting take on the SH theme. Seemed to be realistic dialogue between the actors and some funny areas but I felt the story lacked a direction and simply relied on the audience knowing the celebrities.

But for a OWC written only for the OWC it was fine.

A very creative premise.

I thought the scenes between Bale and Affleck were quite funny.

Solid writing throughout.

This gets a recommend from me.

Hmm, I liked the idea of Bale and Afleck and the passing on of the superhero mantle... but it didn't really make me laugh... now if you'd have started with Deadpool ;-)

This did have some fun banter between Ben and Bale, but I think this would have worked better if the actors were kept out of this.  It's actually a good idea, a superpowered tailor that cleans the unis of all the heroes.  But more could have been done with the concept, such as the seamstress loses a costume and has to deal with a disgruntled hero, or a hero forgets his ticket and the seamstress flat out refuses to hand back his costume even after he vows to burn the place down with his laser vision, or maybe a certain alien blood stain that just won't come out, etc, etc.

I liked this, but, it didn't fulfill the task of the OWC.  

It was kinda funny.  It was kinda interesting.  It did have the seamstress vibe from the Incredibles movie (can't wait for the sequel, that and Frozen)

But, sorry, it didn't complete the task.

5.5/10  Would have been higher if it completed the task.  Who was the superhero?  The seamstress isn't a hero.  He's just a worker.  If it was his superpower to create stuff that shouldn't mix, that's one thing, but, that wasn't what we were given.

Sorry
Dan

I could only imagine the creative fun the author had while writing this, is this seamstress Stan Lee I wonder.

It's a fun read, and it's different.

Good idea of superhero transference, but it was not played out well.  Not as funny as it could have been.  But OK

That was cool and I liked it. Not the superhero thing but clever. Reminds me of the Incredibles seamstress so nice job changing to a guy in thick glasses.

I didn’t see any new superhero here as the Seamstress just seemed like a male version of the one from the Incredibles. However, as a spoof of the Hollywood superhero genre this was clever and funny. I did like the idea of Christian being upset about passing over the mantle and Deadpool coming in at the end was a good twist.

Good job, well done for entering.

-Mark

Liked the Affleck Bale interaction, not sure the Seamstress was really enough of a superhero to slot this comfortably into the brief, but it was good fun and something different.

Well done

The name Christian Bale made me yawn...
I always dislike reading a script all the way knowing that only ridiculous looking doubles of real starlets could act in. It's not even a try and I'd prefer any weird material over celebrity fantasy scripts. Sorry, not my taste. But others seem to like it, so what...

0,

This one didn't really follow the rules, as there's no new hero here. Having said that, I quite enjoyed it. It was funny in parts, without it being LOL funny. It was well written and pretty clever. I enjoyed the ending too.

Nice work.

Glenn.

A seamstress cannot be a man. It just can't. The ess at the end denotes the feminine form. The male form would be Tailor or, if such a thing ever existed, then the word, Seamster would do it. You just can't have a male seamstress. It defies grammar, god-damn you!

I initially liked the idea of a seamstress that fixes/makes superhero costumes, thought it was original... but I now see that it has already been done and this is a rip-off. I couldn't read all the way to the end, so never did get to understand why actors are in the tailor's. I just couldn't get along with this type of humour.

Like Dustin, I agree that a seamstress cannot be male...it just doesn't make sense.

I stayed in to Page 4 and saw no attempts at humor and no super hero.

I am not put off by using real life peeps, but these 2 didn't do or say anything interesting, funny, or funny.

Ditto on the gender issue. Ought to be tailor. I'll let it slide, though, since the script made mention of it. Anyway...

Well-written. Strong concept. Dug everything up to the transfer of power.

Basically, the punchline is... nothing happens; just the "L" and a portable bidet. This is pretty lame, but also doesn't make sense. Even though it had absolutely nothing to do with the proceedings, the seamstress was still prepared to do something with the bidet. What... and why? Even if we accept the punchline, there's still the situation of the seamstress basically going "I'm just going to hold this" for no reason.

Best part was all the Batman posturing. I could've gone for more of that. Strangely, the jokes during the transfer weren't as funny though. Not sure why.

Not bad, I guess. Just wish you'd done more with the idea.

The writing is really good. Maybe... too good. It actually slows the read down somewhat and sets up a tone that doesn’t quite fit with Christian Bale and Ben Affleck walking through the door.

I really like this one. Nice little spoof on passing the torch from one actor to another with a good Ryan Reynolds gag at the end. I could see this airing as a late night show skit with the actual actors and it fitting right in.

Might have to knock off points for lacking a superhero, though.