W.H.O. by Christopher Singh - Short, Sci Fi, Fantasy - Story of Doctor Who's origins, parents and his early childhood. 12 pages - pdf, format

Writer interested in feedback on this work

Problems right away

Quoted Text INT: IN A SPACE SHIP ABOVE EARTH Out of a window in-between the darkness of space is a beautiful blue planet with a few black patches covering it, a loud "BANG!" is heard and a woman is immediately seen being thrown across the room. ANASTASIA what the hell was that! Computer, did something just hit us?

- You must into your characters before using them in dialogue.

- Sentences start with a capital letter - tons of places throughout with this issue

I liked the old Doctor Who show, where he (or she?) was not the focus, it was the world that he lived in.  

You haven't seen the first episode of Doctor Who Christopher unless you're attempting a full reboot. This contradicts a lot of the canon. The TARDIS was not a blue box before the Doctor entered it, it got stuck that way as the series begins.  Didn't like the humansing of the Doctor in the story,  I prefer when he is 'the other', 'the unknown'. They have tried to that to death in the new series which makes it lose something I think.

And what was it with the W.H.O World Health Organization thing?