The Levites by Alexander B Morgan - Series, Sci Fi, Fantasy - A group of high school students discover their past lives and involvement in an immortal battle between two biblical organizations.   51 pages - pdf format

Writer interested in feedback on this work

This script starts off with is what is known in reformation art as 'The Procession'. The march of Jesus and the 2 condemned to Golgotha with associated characters and mob following them. Read the first page, never read a story like this before, and got know where it is going. All the Biblical characters are introduced with another name in brackets which I presume are your contemporary present day characters. I think you need to find a more interesting way of establishing that detail. Maybe you have done that already in the pages that follow.