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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board  /  Short Drama Scripts  /  A Car Ride Into The Next Life
Posted by: Don, March 7th, 2019, 5:27pm
A car ride into the next life by Simon Parker - Short, Drama - Suddenly finding himself at the wheel on a car, a young man come to accept his own death if he's going to make it to heaven. 4 pages - pdf format

Writer interested in feedback on this work

Posted by: Andrew, March 9th, 2019, 3:01am; Reply: 1
This is interesting. Personally, I really like the concept of Bobby in his last moments, coming to terms with what has happened.

But the execution is too short, and too devoid of conflict. If he is going to heaven, as an audience, we need to understand why, what the stakes are, could he have gone to hell, what actually happened, etc.

There are so many ways you can take this interesting concept (and maybe you want something brief), but for me this is best explored with tension between where he goes, and what the stakes are for that decision.
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