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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board  /  Short Comedy Scripts  /  Funny or Not
Posted by: Don, May 28th, 2019, 2:41pm
Funny or Not by Anthony Parlogean - Short, Comedy - A man and his internet companion have struck gold with the discovery of a hysterically funny video. But is it really that funny? 4 pages - pdf format

Writer interested in feedback on this work

Posted by: ghost and_ghostie gal, May 29th, 2019, 3:27am; Reply: 1
@Writer

Bear in mind that humor is such a personal thing. Other readers may fall about laughing. Me, I didn't find this funny.   Not one bit.  What might have made me crack a smile? Um, lemme think... maybe if we actually got to see the video.  Basically what we have here is some Guy, watching a video on you tube and laughing himself to death.  There's no story here.   You used four pages to tell us something you could have written in one.


Quoted Text
The guy starts to progressively laugh harder. All of a
sudden, he sputters out loud in uncontrollable fits. He claps
his hand in affirmation, bellowing out loud bursts of noises
from his face.  


The Guy breaks into riotous laughter.  He can barely control the mouse, he's laughing so hard.

Give the guy a name and age at least.  

BRAD, 20, immature, slight geek who doesn't know it, in a skimpy speedo, slouches behind his desk.  Fires up his laptop, cracks his knuckles.

Mind you, I constructed this... based off the Guy in your script.  Brush up on screenwriting in general. Good luck...
Posted by: Arundel, May 29th, 2019, 1:39pm; Reply: 2
Not sure what to make of this. Title is a reminder of the site "Funny or Die." Plays out like a late-night sketch. One that makes the viewer scratch their head and go, "Huh?"

Didn't know what the point of it was. Scene structure? Acting exercise? Was slightly impressed by the visual of the Guy laughing uncontrollably in the office and the camera zooming or cutting to make it look like he "swallows it."

But why does he plug in his headphones if he is all alone? Only thought is to make sure the viewer as kept in the dark to what he is watching/hearing. No other reason.

Yes its odd and doesn't do much, but was striking enough to elicit a response/review.
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