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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board  /  Screenwriting Class  /  Formatting question
Posted by: JohnI, February 24th, 2020, 11:17am
Okay - so I’m taking some advice and rewriting 7 days in La Suerte - been getting great reads with suggestions by producers and studios,

I’m flipping scenes.

So if I start with a flashback (first scene) (Guy is actually in daze looking out from his diner.)

And then go to a customer snapping him out of it in the diner (scene 2

Is the fhe first scene written as a flashback (you’re not flashing back from any previous scene) or is it better to just leave it (easy to figure out the way second screen starts.) or is it better o have a super: 3 years laters.

Thanks ahead of time.
Posted by: Zack, February 24th, 2020, 11:22am; Reply: 1
Put FLASHBACK in the slug.

Example:

INT. HOUSE - NIGHT - FLASHBACK


If you put a super stating it's three years later, then the previous scene wouldn't be a flashback.
Posted by: eldave1, February 26th, 2020, 2:13pm; Reply: 2
Is in most cases, clarity is king.

I do have a personal preference here. Not a fan of flashback because in an opening scene I don't really know who's flashback it is and from where. So I like to use a SUPER instead. E.G:

INT. DINER - NIGHT

blah, blah, blah

SUPER: Two hours earlier

blah, blah, blah -

INT. DINER - (PRESENT TIME) NIGHT

blah blah, blah.
Posted by: DustinBowcot (Guest), February 27th, 2020, 7:37am; Reply: 3
The thing with the suggestions from studios and producers... unless changing the script means they're going to option it then their opinions are just opinions. If the script is worthy of being made and merely takes a few tweaks then why don't they option it?
Posted by: Dreamscale (Guest), February 27th, 2020, 10:23am; Reply: 4
Never put FLASHBACK in a Slug.

Never begin with a Flashback, because as you correctly said, it's not a Flashback.

personally, I don't quite understand the scene you're trying to create.  It doesn't sound like a Flashback to me at all.  Sounds like a guy is dreamily looking out a window and someone slaps him "awake".

That has nothing to do with a Flashback.
Posted by: Matthew Taylor, February 27th, 2020, 11:31am; Reply: 5
Using FLASHBACK in a slug is perfectly legitimate - https://www.keepwriting.com/tsc/flashback.htm

Although it's not a flashback as it is the first scene.

Do we need to know it's precisely 3 years later? if yes, then the super is the way to go.
If all we need to know is that this was in the past then I don't see the point.

Would be easier to comment if you posted up this first scene and the beginning of the next.

Posted by: eldave1, February 27th, 2020, 12:02pm; Reply: 6

Quoted from Matthew Taylor
Using FLASHBACK in a slug is perfectly legitimate - https://www.keepwriting.com/tsc/flashback.htm

Although it's not a flashback as it is the first scene.

Do we need to know it's precisely 3 years later? if yes, then the super is the way to go.
If all we need to know is that this was in the past then I don't see the point.

Would be easier to comment if you posted up this first scene and the beginning of the next.




Correct IMO - and again - clarity is king - if it is clear, it is probably not going to matter.  

Side note: I did look up the Trottier link is he is usually be go to on formatting. Saw this:



Quoted Text
Don't tell the reader about the past until he or she cares about the future.

A flashback should not stop a movie just to provide exposition.

A flashback should move the story forward.


And my gut reaction was bullshit.  For every one of these guidelines you could find a stellar movie that violated the guideline and it turned out great.   i.e., he doesn't think Forrest Gump used flashback to provide exposition????

Anyway....just irked me cause he's normally so spot on.


Posted by: Dreamscale (Guest), February 27th, 2020, 2:50pm; Reply: 7

Quoted from Matthew Taylor
Using FLASHBACK in a slug is perfectly legitimate - [url]https://www.keepwriting.com/tsc/flashback.htm[/url


So, check this out...

If you use Flashback as part of your Slug(s), think about what happens in a Flashback scene with multiple Slugs.  You have to throw that old Flashback into each and every Slug of the Flashback, and if you have Slugs that are being used both in current time and in Flashback time, you'll have a whole bunch more Slugs showing up in your script report, when in reality, they're the same locale.

Also, how do you end the Flashback scene(s)?  Well, normally, you'd simply use BEGIN FLASHBACK and when it's over, END FLASHBACK, but if you use Flashback in your Slugs, you wouldn't use END FLASHBACK, because you never used BEGIN FLASHBACK.  You'd just have to hope your reader is paying very close attention and seeing FLASHBACK in the Slugs.

It's just much cleaner and easier to follow if you don't do it that way.  
Posted by: Zack, February 27th, 2020, 3:47pm; Reply: 8
I see no issue using Flashbacks in slugs. You know the flashback is over when the next slug comes along and no longer has Flashback in it. Simple enough.
Posted by: Dreamscale (Guest), February 27th, 2020, 3:59pm; Reply: 9

Quoted from Zack
I see no issue using Flashbacks in slugs. You know the flashback is over when the next slug comes along and no longer has Flashback in it. Simple enough.


What if you have multiple scenes (Slugs) in that Flashback?

Do you think every reader pays close attention to each and every Slug?  Especially if they're seeing the same Slugs over and over?

Posted by: eldave1, February 27th, 2020, 4:07pm; Reply: 10

Quoted from Dreamscale


What if you have multiple scenes (Slugs) in that Flashback?





What if you don't
Posted by: Dreamscale (Guest), February 27th, 2020, 4:30pm; Reply: 11

Quoted from eldave1


What if you don't


Oh boy, here we go again.

What if you have a single location, and you use HOUSE?  No problem, right?  But, what if you have numerous different HOUSE locations?  Obviously, you need to make it clear which house we're at, right?  This is why you shouldn't use HOUSE ever.

You should write the "right" way every single time, whether it matters for that script or not.

Exact same issue with using BEGIN FLASHBACK when you have a Flashback, and ending it with END FLASHBACK - every single time.  It's just dumb to put FLASHBACK in your Slugs, as you will make mistakes you wouldn't make if you didn't do it that way.

Posted by: eldave1, February 27th, 2020, 4:40pm; Reply: 12

Quoted from Dreamscale


Oh boy, here we go again.

What if you have a single location, and you use HOUSE?  No problem, right?  But, what if you have numerous different HOUSE locations?  Obviously, you need to make it clear which house we're at, right?  This is why you shouldn't use HOUSE ever.

You should write the "right" way every single time, whether it matters for that script or not.

Exact same issue with using BEGIN FLASHBACK when you have a Flashback, and ending it with END FLASHBACK - every single time.  It's just dumb to put FLASHBACK in your Slugs, as you will make mistakes you wouldn't make if you didn't do it that way.



Dude, you gave the example of what if you had multiple flashbacks,  this confusing the issue. So, it seems as though your position is never ever.  Okay,  I got it. Don't necessarily agree with that,  but I don't think your view is crazy either.  Just don't share it.
Posted by: Matthew Taylor, February 27th, 2020, 5:26pm; Reply: 13

Quoted from Dreamscale


So, check this out...

If you use Flashback as part of your Slug(s), think about what happens in a Flashback scene with multiple Slugs.  You have to throw that old Flashback into each and every Slug of the Flashback, and if you have Slugs that are being used both in current time and in Flashback time, you'll have a whole bunch more Slugs showing up in your script report, when in reality, they're the same locale.

Also, how do you end the Flashback scene(s)?  Well, normally, you'd simply use BEGIN FLASHBACK and when it's over, END FLASHBACK, but if you use Flashback in your Slugs, you wouldn't use END FLASHBACK, because you never used BEGIN FLASHBACK.  You'd just have to hope your reader is paying very close attention and seeing FLASHBACK in the Slugs.

It's just much cleaner and easier to follow if you don't do it that way.  


Yep, the link I posted addresses multiple locations and recommends your method of format. Link also says you can end the flashback with either a PRESENT DAY in the following slug or an END FLASHBACK on its own line (for flashbacks in a single location where FLASHBACK has been used in the slug)

Only posted it because the method you mention is your personal preference (and mine too as it happens) but doesn't mean other legitimate format options should be recommended as "never" use.

Posted by: Dreamscale (Guest), February 27th, 2020, 5:41pm; Reply: 14

Quoted from Matthew Taylor


Yep, the link I posted addresses multiple locations and recommends your method of format. Link also says you can end the flashback with either a PRESENT DAY in the following slug or an END FLASHBACK on its own line (for flashbacks in a single location where FLASHBACK has been used in the slug)

Only posted it because the method you mention is your personal preference (and mine too as it happens) but doesn't mean other legitimate format options should be recommended as "never" use.


I only recommend to "never use" because in many situations you'll find that you, the writer, will be doing more work, possibly missing/forgetting to add it to the Slug, and then your readers having more trouble, missing it in the Slug, etc.

If you "end" your Flashback by inserting PRESENT DAY in the next Slug, then you have yet another variation in your Slugs - the same Slug with and without PRESENT DAY or FLASHBACK.

Just so much easier and clearer to do it as was trying to say.  

Posted by: eldave1, February 27th, 2020, 5:52pm; Reply: 15

Quoted from Dreamscale


I only recommend to "never use" because in many situations you'll find that you, the writer, will be doing more work, possibly missing/forgetting to add it to the Slug, and then your readers having more trouble, missing it in the Slug, etc.

If you "end" your Flashback by inserting PRESENT DAY in the next Slug, then you have yet another variation in your Slugs - the same Slug with and without PRESENT DAY or FLASHBACK.

Just so much easier and clearer to do it as was trying to say.  


Your reasoning is sound. Just nuke the word never in your recommendations and you're there
Posted by: Zack, February 27th, 2020, 5:54pm; Reply: 16

Quoted from Dreamscale


Do you think every reader pays close attention to each and every Slug?  Especially if they're seeing the same Slugs over and over?



I believe readers should pay attention to each and every slug. That said, I see your point.
Posted by: Dreamscale (Guest), February 27th, 2020, 6:22pm; Reply: 17

Quoted from Zack


I believe readers should pay attention to each and every slug. That said, I see your point.


I think they should, too, but trust me, they don't!

Posted by: DustinBowcot (Guest), February 28th, 2020, 3:09am; Reply: 18
What readers are being talked about here? If you're paying for coverage then the readers will read every slug. If a producer is interested in your work then they too will read every slug. If you're talking about an OWC and half the writers here, then who gives a toss whether they read every slug or not?

You don't actually need to specify FLASHBACK in your scripts if it is clear what is going on. You can tell me I'm wrong as much as you like, it still doesn't make you right.
Posted by: JohnI, February 28th, 2020, 12:28pm; Reply: 19
I have decided not to use flashback because the next scene makes it perfectly obvious. He snaps out of a daze)

Dave, as far as what trottier says - i think he’s great at formatting but poor at his story telling lessons. I.E in my story that first scene is necessary for the next (protagonist agrument with his wife. This happens in many movies.

As for it is slug - I’m assuming you guys like me have read scripts and studied the graft.

Everywhere I read - said either (BEGIN FLASHBACK) or in slug is acceptable -(as are a number of other methods - see trottier’s bible)  i use the first example if the flashback occurs within a scene and the second if it’s a scene until itself.

Dreamscale - one think I disagree is the use in a slug on every scene of multiple scenes (I may have misunderstood you.) Once you’re in the flashback - you’re in it til you note otherwise.

Simply - slug with (Begin flashback) and Slug with (Back to present day)
These are used in examples in both trottier and August as are the other methods.

I think trottier says it right - do what you think fits best and BE CONSISTENT.

Anyway - thanks for your advice - I used it in not using the flashback at all.  

JOhn
Posted by: DustinBowcot (Guest), February 28th, 2020, 12:46pm; Reply: 20
If it is clear and the reader doesn't get it, they're not worthy of having a job in the first place. All this bullshit that prevails is mostly due to writers making up excuses for why their work didn't sell.

Your instincts will usually be correct. Writers here will claim confusion just because you do something different to them even if they actually get it. Writing around ugly format is surely always preferable. The reader doesn't need to instantly get it. So long as they get it soon after, then it's all good... and some will even enjoy the fact that you're allowing them to think for themselves.

If in doubt, use the camera direction. If you're confident, then write how you want.
Posted by: eldave1, February 28th, 2020, 7:25pm; Reply: 21

Quoted from JohnI
I have decided not to use flashback because the next scene makes it perfectly obvious. He snaps out of a daze)

Dave, as far as what trottier says - i think he’s great at formatting but poor at his story telling lessons. I.E in my story that first scene is necessary for the next (protagonist agrument with his wife. This happens in many movies.

As for it is slug - I’m assuming you guys like me have read scripts and studied the graft.

Everywhere I read - said either (BEGIN FLASHBACK) or in slug is acceptable -(as are a number of other methods - see trottier’s bible)  i use the first example if the flashback occurs within a scene and the second if it’s a scene until itself.

Dreamscale - one think I disagree is the use in a slug on every scene of multiple scenes (I may have misunderstood you.) Once you’re in the flashback - you’re in it til you note otherwise.

Simply - slug with (Begin flashback) and Slug with (Back to present day)
These are used in examples in both trottier and August as are the other methods.

I think trottier says it right - do what you think fits best and BE CONSISTENT.

Anyway - thanks for your advice - I used it in not using the flashback at all.  

JOhn


My pleasure, John

Posted by: eldave1, February 28th, 2020, 7:40pm; Reply: 22

Quoted from DustinBowcot
If it is clear and the reader doesn't get it, they're not worthy of having a job in the first place. All this bullshit that prevails is mostly due to writers making up excuses for why their work didn't sell.

Your instincts will usually be correct. Writers here will claim confusion just because you do something different to them even if they actually get it. Writing around ugly format is surely always preferable. The reader doesn't need to instantly get it. So long as they get it soon after, then it's all good... and some will even enjoy the fact that you're allowing them to think for themselves.

If in doubt, use the camera direction. If you're confident, then write how you want.


I agree with this. Also think it is a matter of personal preference. When I started writing I really tried to make everything technically correct. Now my order of importance is:

1. Clarity
2. Readability
3. Technical rules.

As an example, if I am supposed to use a full header based on standard screenwriting protocols but I think a mini-slug would make the read pop more I'll say - fok it - use the mini-slug.  






Posted by: Zack, February 28th, 2020, 7:56pm; Reply: 23

Quoted from eldave1


I agree with this. Also think it is a matter of personal preference. When I started writing I really tried to make everything technically correct. Now my order of importance is:

1. Clarity
2. Readability
3. Technical rules.

As an example, if I am supposed to use a full header based on standard screenwriting protocols but I think a mini-slug would make the read pop more I'll say - fok it - use the mini-slug.  








Seems perfectly sensible to me.
Posted by: JohnI, February 29th, 2020, 12:04pm; Reply: 24
Dave as usually you’re the best - I agree with that 100% of time.
Posted by: eldave1, February 29th, 2020, 12:17pm; Reply: 25

Quoted from JohnI
Dave as usually you’re the best - I agree with that 100% of time.


Thanks, mate
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