Cat Butt Christmas by Baba O'Riley - Newlyweds merge their bizarre Christmas ornament collections--and the results are magical.  Short, Comedy

Out here in the fields, I fight for my meals!! Interesting fact, Pete Townsend wrote that line after a fight in the supermarket at Christmas time with a stranger over the last turkey...FACT.

Hey writer,

Well, I laughed at the absurdity of it all, but I really am not sure what my takeaways are here. It was like a surreal dream, a cut away in a Flight Of The Conchords video, the sort of thing I would have come up with art school after, well, doing extra curricular activities.

There’s not that much of a story, you could have cut a quarter of the writing and taken it into 4 pages with the same outcome. It was a bit weird, not really sure what to make of it tbh...it was alright, nice one.

Merry Xmas and well done on entering,

Cam

P.S. Obvs this review was brought to you by the Who, had to flick that bad boy on

I didn't know what a 'Rubbermaid bins' were, now I do, thanks.

Cat butt magic manifests in unpredictable ways.  - Great line

Much of this makes little sense and it lost me more than once.

But there's something about it that I like, it's got a certain charm.

Good effort

That was good. Well done. I laughed more than once at the jokes and the absurdity. A stupid ghostly dance at the end to tie in the symbolism of the two ornaments being the only ones left on the tree and their lasting relationship. Ahhhhh. Haha. Just the right amount of stupid that will surely gather some laughs at festivals -- if anyone ever had the balls to produce it, that is.

Not sure how to put this.

You're writing is far better than the ornaments.

Just some lovely thoughts here - the dialogue about no the mingling of the ornaments as a sign of relationship status was just great.

The visuals of two virtual couples dancing - fantastic.

There is a lot of really solid emotional tugging here. I just wish you wouldn't have used a double anus cat ornament and a roll of toilet paper to get there.  It's like you couldn't quite decide if you wanted comedy or drama.

That being said - high marks from me - well done.

Okay... What!

I loved it up until this point:

Moments after they leave, shadows swirl.
In this dreamy, sugarplum hour, comes something truly
magical: a fanciful dance spectacle.

The experimental dance/dream sequence just didn't do it for me, sorry.
Some terrific writing. I think reading it entertained me more than if I watched it.

Definite chops on display.

I really enjoyed this one! Very unique! The writer had the hipster thing down with their obscure, outside-of-the-box ornaments. And the whimsical dance sequence was terrific at the end. It was lovely, romantic and warm without being corny. Dialogue was great, writing was solid. Excellent work!

-- Michael

Interesting  title.

Writing was solid.

Story itself was very unique. Not really my type of comedy, but I did enjoy the absurdity in this one. The whole dance sequence at the end was a nice touch. Overall I liked this one, but just don't get the point of it all.

Good work.

Charming, entertaining, creative and different.

There is a lot to admire about this, the only quibble for me is it reads like a couple of scenes and not a complete story. The magic of the cat butt is left unexplained as is the point of the outcome but top marks for originality!

Yeah, I don't know. I'm not quite as enthralled as previous readers. I was on board through the decorating of the tree and the final acceptance of the crappy tube but then it just got silly. The writing is well done, I just didn't find it that humorous. Maybe I just didn't get it.

Well...uh...hmmm...

Not sure what to say or how to say it, and that's for reals.

On 1 level, I like what's being said here.

On another level, there's hardly any story here at all, and what is here is...well...it's odd to say the least.

The dance number at the end is again and big hit and a big miss for me.  I'd lose the costumes, and just have the 2 dancing beside the tree, and maybe have the 2 ornaments "jump" off the tree and join the dance, signifying that the 2 have become 1.

Another tough one to judge, but I'm afraid all in all, this one doesn't quite work for me, but it's definitely an entry to remember.

**1/2

Hello writer

The hell did I just read?

I feel like I would like watching this if I was stoned and at no other time.

I guess there is a slight charm to it, the two ornaments coming together.

Great writing on display though, a seasoned pro. I guess I like my cat ornaments with heads.

Well, lonely and adrift in a sea of lines that slap but do not tickle her funny bone. ;)

Probably the work of a Simply Script’s veteran... no qualms with the writing, the story felt fresh. I was able to follow. no problems there. It did illicit a smile out of me. You create a quick feel of the characters. That said, for me... it was just okay. Seems to be trying to be overly cutsie borderlining absurdly cutsie. Um, not a bad thing. Nonetheless -- a good entry. Best of Irish luck!-ghostie girl.

There's heart in this I suppose.
And the writing is very good.

both of them are too sweet for my tastes tho. And even though I get the gist of the story it's a bit light conflict/story wise. So, I guess I want more.
Nice sentiment. But they keep hanging the ornaments and talking. I got what they were talking about. I wish they were fighting and talking and solving some dilemmas. Or being funny and more of a personality.

so, for every nice thing I say I have something that's not I suppose.

Writer,

Hmm. I wanted to like this more than I did, but it just kind of turned into nonsense at the end. And I don’t necessarily mean that in a bad way. I appreciated the effort, and got what you were going for, but the way it ended just didn’t grab me as a more cohesive story would have. That said, I like the imagery you provided and the asides were only a minor annoyance, sometimes well placed. Good effort!

Steve

My favorite this week~
I think the writer perfectly captured the corny yet earnest spirit of the holidays while adding their unique spin.

Loved the imagery and the vivid descriptions. Separately, they’re a couple of cat butts and an old toilet paper roll,
but when they come together they’re greater than the sum of their parts.

Sweet sentiment, awesome stuff.