Jeff, you gotta give the guy props for paying attention on the boards to notice that you gave yourself the name Rosco at one point.

Uh oh!  Jeff's drinking on the boards again!  Insanity usually ensues.

Anyway, Alex, as for the stalking scenes...  I don't think you want too much, if any, repetetive scenes, unless you are doing something like the element in 'Groundhog Day'.

Do you really think you need 3 or 4 scenes to show that this guy's been stalking this girl for awhile?  Or is there a way you can write it so that you can just show it once and the audience can figure out he's been doing this for awhile?

Also, is this a short or a feature?  3 or 4 of the same exact scenes will get annoying in a feature, and I don't even want to think about it in a short.

- Mark

Ooops!  I remember now.  Sorry about that everyone.

Any scene you write, should be made out of choice, not by way of perceived necessity.

Perceived necessity:I must use multiple scenes to show this guy following the girl, or the reader/audience will not understand he has been stalking for some time.

VS

Choice: Or, I could use one scene to convey the same information- now what method fits that - and work from there.

For example, if we see a guy lurking in the bushes and check a diary, or phone, with a list of times and places, the last place on that list, where he just happens to be, then . . . cue girl, I think we'll figure out she's being stalked.

. . . that fear of being watched . . . it's the sole reason I don't take part in forum discussions

Thanks Mark and Eoin,

All the advice has been great and I have undecided between 2 alternatives.

Option 1.
The girl walks along the path with a shadow of a stalker watching her closely, every so far a quickflash appears showing her walking the same path on a different day, until the final part of this scene where she it taken.


Option 2.
Showing an initial scene where the girl walks along the path, including the intricacies of where she repeats the same action (mentioned by babz) cross at this location, stops and looks in the same shop window etc etc.
Then repeating the same scene further in the feature, though this time the girl gets taken at the end of the scene.

I am probably swaying more towards Option 2 ATM, what do you guys think.

Alex

Alex,

You need to make your decision on how your story is told - not on what everyone thinks of one scene.  

If your story is very linear then you probably don't want to go with option 1.  

Thanks Michael,

Yes you are right, It is linear so Option 2 may be the way.

Option 1 would probably cause a bit of audience confusion.

Alex