One of the perks of knowing someone who works at a video store is that you get to watch bad movies for free. After you've seen a real stinker, there's a sense of satisfaction that it didn't cost you anything. As is the case with Turistas.

First off, just to set the record straight, Turistas is not a Hostel ripoff so I'd advise against going into it thinking you're going to enjoy it because you enjoyed Hostel. Turistas shares only two things in common with Eli Roth's movie: the concept of American tourists exploiting foreign countries only to be exploited themselves and a scene in which a character chases after someone wearing another character's item of clothing. This is NOT a torture movie and calling a horror movie a ripoff because it involves tourist victims in a foreign country is just nonsense. So if you liked Hostel, I'd advise against wasting your money on this one because they're really nothing alike. You've been warned.

Anyway, Turistas follows a group of English and American tourists in Brazil. Their tour bus brakes down in the middle of nowhere and it seems like a major bump in the road (no pun intended) however they soon discover they've been stranded in an island paradise. After a night of partying, the tourists wake up to find all their money, luggage, and passports have been stollen. After running into a spot of trouble with the locals, they are befriended by a Brazilian native who leads them to a deserted house in the middle of the jungle. Before long, the tourists discover they've been lead into the headquarters of a vigilante doctor bent on stealing their organs to sell to a major Brazilian hospital.

It's almost a cliche how poorly developed characters are in horror movies. Turistas is no exception. The tourist protagonists are so underdeveloped that by the end of the movie, I couldn't even tell the good guys and the bad guys apart. They all looked alike. I don't even remember their names. The only one who stood out was this loud-mouthed English dude. The only character who was developed in the movie was the main doctor antagonist, Zamora, who's development was basically summed in a scene that barely five minutes long. "On the nose?" This scene is a textbook example.

Then there's the director. A guy named John Stockwell. He's not a horror director but ironically, this movie is right up his alley as he seems obsessed with making movies about tropical beaches and surfer babes (his other two movies are Into The Blue and Blue Crush). This definitely shows as scenes of tropical beaches and hidden coves actually make you want to go to Brazil (in my case, again) but his attempts at making a horror movie are pitiful. I'll commend him for his use of only light sources shown onscreen (e.g. flashlights), one of the many suspense techniques that made the Descent such a great film, but Turistas has absolutely NO suspense and little gore (I saw the unrated DVD) and the gore that there is is handled in such a casual and detached way, it's disturbing (not in a good way). The one organ harvesting scene feels like the filmmakers didn't even care what was going on.

All in all, Turistas is trite, dull, and bad in ways even some of the worst horror movies today aren't. Even if you're a hardcore gorehound, it's probably going to disappoint you. This one is a real stinker.

being a horror fan myself, this was a movie i figured i would check out one day, but i'm glad you were here to warn me cause there's nothing more unsatisifying then watching a bad horror movie.

don't be put off swapjack, this movie isn't that bad. It's no Hostel, but it's a nice little distraction while waiting for Hostel Part 2. The films biggest problem is the oversized cast. there are just too many characters. There also a surprising lack of gore, but what you do see looks EXTREMELY good. So if you where expecting a Hostel killer, you will be dissapointed, but if your looking for a decent rent, Turistas will do you know harm (it'll just take your kidneys and liver). 6 out of 10