How do you write out the action scene?

If someone can provide some good scripts that I can read, that would help out a ton.

Thanks.

tweak

When writing fight scenes, just write enough to give the reader a general idea how you want it to be.  The duration of the fight, any weapons used, whether or not the participants are evenly matched and the outcome are all that really matters.

Directors bring in their own fight coordinators who will ignore most of what you wrote.

I have a couple of fight sequences in The Burnout.


Phil

I asked a similar question a long time ago on here and never really got a clear answer.

I have attempted to add martial arts into a script, almost move by move and it turned out good as I put a lot of effort into a single fight scene. I haven't read the scene in quite some time but last I remember people appreciate effort more so than just putting "And they fight"

Not everything is writing for a producer or director so trial and error can also come into play. Try it one way, if it works people will tell you and if it doesn't, you have all the time in the world to make it better.

The problem with this, Wes, is that it throws the one-page-equals-one-minute guideline out the window.  If you were to try writing one minute of fighting from a Jackie Chan or Jet Li movie, it would probably take ten pages top do it.  And I don't think that anyone wants to read that much fighting in a script.

A summarized version, IMHO, is the way to go.


Phil

I submit for your enjoyment the fight between Bruce Willis and Alexander Godunov in Die Hard, from the shooting version of the script.  At my count, this fight runs about 1:40 altogether (there's a lot of cutting back and forth).

Pretty short and to the point, isn't it.

326     THE MACHINE FLOOR                                     326

        McClane and Karl move towards each other, each sizing the other
        up, each looking over the terrain.

                                MCCLANE
                 Better this way, isn't it?  I mean,
                 any faggot can shoot a gun.

        This time Karl doesn't take the bait.  Then, when he
        does charge, it's unexpected.

        The two men fight brutally, Karl bringing years of martial
        training to this moment, McClane bringing nothing but the street.

327     NEW ANGLE                                             327

                                MCCLANE
                 You should've heard your brother
                 scream when I broke his fucking
                 neck...

        Karl steps in quickly with a deadly move.  McClane twists free,
        slams an elbow into Karl's kidney.  Karl backs off, circles
        McClane with new respect.

(Tic's note:  We cut away at this point and then cut back....)

337     MACHINE FLOOR                                         337

        Karl drives McClane back with a sweeping head kick.  Another one.
        McClane is staggering.  He gets in one hard punch and then Karl
        charges at him.  McClane falls backwards, drives his legs
        upwards, propelling Karl into the air:

338     LOW ANGLE                                             338

        Karl goes into a loop of chain hanging over a turbine, becomes
        entangled.

339     MCCLANE                                               339

        jumps to his feet, yanks the other end of the chain.

340     KARL                                                  340

        is JERKED upwards by the neck.  He TWITCHES like a captured
        fish -- starts to turn blue:

341     MCCLANE                                               341

        Twists the chain end around a pipe as Karl STILLS.  McClane
        snatches up his Baretta from the floor, runs out.

I've written a script with extensive martial arts in it from nothing but my own judgement and I'm inclined to agree with Phil. It's better to write something along the lines of "they fight for an extended period of time" than writing out the entire fight, blow by blow. You can throw in some specifics here and there if you've got some particularly good ideas but I'd say around 80% should be left to the imagination. If you've really got your heart set on details, you can break up the fight with dialogue (as seen above) to make it a little smoother but I'm not sure that's really the way to go. A couple people thought my script had a little too much action. Too much action is hard to read. I think it all boils down to balance. I think there's merit in what both Phil and Wes are saying. But again, I'd lean towards less, not more. That's my advice.

You can write "They fight for an extended period of time" but the reader especially on a site like this will mention it as a flaw.

I didn't mean a 20 minute fight scene back and forth block by block, hit by hit. Those kinds of fights died when Shaw Brothers stopped making films.

I meant the gist of what the fight is. Who cares if big producers or joe blow indy guy doesn't want the fight scenes, you're not writing it for them. You're writing it because (In most cases) you love writing.

If I see that in a script and I haven't to date, I would say that's a poor mans fight. A cop out even that you're not willing to at least give a general idea of what is/should be going on.

The Matrix has the fight scenes in the script. Big Hollywood film.

Depending on what the fight is. The ones I have written were never really that long and were broken up with dialogue. The general audience isn't stupid, if they know what they're getting into they will enjoy it no matter what.

Don't get me wrong. I think it's good to add things to a fight sequence to make it more interesting. Certain moves or series of moves definitely spice things up. But if the fight consists of general sword fighting or something to that affect, I'd prefer just to write "they fight for an extended period of time" before throwing in a twist. I've never written a fight sequence that consisted only of that phrase. In such a case, you're right. It's a cop out. In any case, the particular script I wrote had several fight scenes going on at once and while they were detailed, for the most part, I tried to summarize a significant chunk of them so they wouldn't come off as overkill. Several people read the script before I did this so what I had written before, almost all details and no summary, was overkill.

Of course it is just my opinion but I also think that any martial arts or gun fight or any other fight should be in the script as a way to tell a story.

Drunken Master and Legend of Drunken Master tell stories as they fight.

Then you have movies that just throw in big action scenes to keep your attention off of the poor plot and bad acting.

Anyway, I believe that if the fight scene tells a story, it should be in the script even if you have trouble writing it... that's what trial and error is for.

If you're writing with the intention of posting it to get feedback, it should have more than just they fight. That's a poor payoff for a reader, especially in a feature.

Maybe you should find a screenplay similar to the one you're writing and compare. Just an idea.

If you write a heavily detailed fight sequence (ie: punch-for-punch) you're going to bore the hell out of anyone who reads it.  Fights are great to watch but they're not great to read.


Phil

Thanks.

I have looked at the scripts:

Speed
Lethal Weapon II
Above the Law

so I have a good idea how to write what I need now.

Thanks,

tweak