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Hi, I've got another query... And seeing as you guys helped clear up my questions about slo-mo/ songs in scripts, I was hoping someone could share some more knowledge
So yeah, basically, I want to have a scene where two main characters are talking on the phone, and I want the scene to be a split screen. But yeah, I don't exactly know how to write this? I've never seen them written in any scripts I've read, and I think it may be down to the director when its done, but I mean, I kind of need it to introduce the characters. I've got a pretty solid idea of how to write them, but I don't want to make a mistake and look like an amateur.
Here's an example of mine that isn't posted here. This is how I've read to do it, how I've seen it in other scripts, and how I've done it in scripts both posted here and not. (Please ignore the scene numbers. Didn't feel like deleting them just for this.)
I know the example is a little long, but it'll give you a full idea of how this is supposed to flow and why a split screen was appropriate in such a case as well as giving you a start and stop to it. If you note the context, this would be a screenwriter decision as opposed to a director one since it gives a clear picture of the intent of the scene.
A phone call would work similarly; they'd just be on the phone. The split should not be confused with an Intercut, however, the typical method of doing a phone call, but written pretty much the same way as a split screen.
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27 EXT. HOUSE – BACK - NIGHT 27
Brenda stands well off the porch, her arms folded. Tom walks out the door.
TOM Didn’t go well, did it?
Brenda scoffs.
BRENDA Prize to Captain Obvious.
TOM What happened?
BRENDA Eddie was Eddie.
28 INT. HOUSE – BRENDA & EDDIE’S ROOM – NIGHT 28
Eddie sits on the bed, staring at the floor. Susan enters.
SUSAN What did you do?
Eddie scoffs.
EDDIE It’s what I didn’t do that’s the problem.
SUSAN I see.
EDDIE Why is this so important right now?
SUSAN I think you know.
27 / 28 SPLIT SCREEN BRENDA / EDDIE 27 / 28
BRENDA I want him to be happy.
EDDIE I want to make her happy.
BRENDA And maybe that’s not with me.
EDDIE But I don’t know how to do it.
BRENDA He could have his heart set on someone else.
EDDIE She’s the only constant I have in my life.
BRENDA Maybe I need to let him go.
EDDIE I don’t want to lose her
BRENDA & EDDIE I just don’t know what to do.
EDDIE If I tell her now, it’ll seem forced and stupid.
BRENDA If he were to come out here right now and finally just tell me, I’d believe him.
EDDIE How could she believe anything I say?
BRENDA He’s too afraid to say it unless it’s true.
EDDIE Am I wasting my life without her?
BRENDA Jeff said I never stood up for myself before.
EDDIE Am I just being stupid because of what Jeff said?
BRENDA If he can’t come out and tell me how he feels tonight...
EDDIE I think if I don’t tell her what she needs to hear...
EDDIE & BRENDA It’s over.
END SPLIT SCREEN
28A INT. HOUSE – BRENDA & EDDIE’S ROOM – NIGHT 28A
Eddie stares at the floor. Susan still sits next to him.
27A EXT. HOUSE – NIGHT 27A
Brenda stares at the ground. Tom stands next to her.
28B INT. HOUSE – BRENDA & EDDIE’S ROOM – NIGHT 28B
Eddie looks up.
27B EXT. HOUSE – NIGHT 27B
Brenda turns around.
28C INT. HOUSE – BRENDA & EDDIE’S ROOM – NIGHT 28C
Eddie leaves the room.
27C EXT. HOUSE – NIGHT 27C
Brenda walks inside.
29 INT. HOUSE – LIVING ROOM – NIGHT 29
Eddie and Brenda meet in the center of the room. Tom and Susan enter from their respective points. Eddie and Brenda stare at each other.
I have a similar deal here. Although mine is not on the telephone.
I want to show that a character has been stuck in a certain room for months. He does a daily routine everyday and I want to do this through split screen. They do different things on both sides, but at the end they both mark a date off on the calendar, one date is like the first week of the month, the other is the last day of the month. Something like that.
I have a similar deal here. Although mine is not on the telephone.
I want to show that a character has been stuck in a certain room for months. He does a daily routine everyday and I want to do this through split screen. They do different things on both sides, but at the end they both mark a date off on the calendar, one date is like the first week of the month, the other is the last day of the month. Something like that.
Any ideas on formatting this would be awesome.
This would be done better with a montage, than with a split screen.
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Question On Writing Split Scenes (ie, Phone Calls)
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