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I actually read this last week but totally forgot to comment on it. There were two things that I envisioned this as.
1) It felt like a segment from a much larger script, maybe something along the lines of Being John Malkovich(which someone mentioned already. It did have that kind of comically weird feel to it) or Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind or something of that sort.
2) The other is that for some reason this felt like a video that could be shown in an introductory course for screenwriting. It had that vibe and gave the messages that you'd hear when venturing into something new, i.e. writing is a magical experience, controlling what goes on in the Ether, etc.
So, it was nice to read. You're a good writer, keep it up.
-Greg
Oh, and in response to the religion thread, here's something we can both agree on; "Just put your faith in a loud guitar."
Once again, thanks for the read and for the nice comments. Remember to let me know when you post something so I can be first on line for it!
As for the religion thread, I made a few comments there, but of course I always enjoy a music reference. I usually quote a Nazareth (ironic) song in this case (not sure where they lifted this phrase from), when people are trying to nail things down to perfection:
script's amazin! It doesn't take much time to read, so i found the time today. Talking in general, i like the way u create your characters. Pete and A.J. are very interesting despite the brevity of the work. The "charlie brown"-thing was very well integrated in the construct and was among the best moments of the screenplay. This entire "world-inside-a-world"-idea looks extremely well. I doubt that it would be enough for cinema but e. g. on a show like "Twlight Zone" on TV it would fit the expectations!
Nice script. I thought most of the dialogue was pretty funny. I thought that the ending wouldve worked better without the cartoon but plug. I liked the way you commented on the fact that you dont have an ending, but I thought you couldve just left it at that.
Another thing I was thinking. Maybe AJ leaves his script unfininshed and goes out for lunch while Pete has a go at the script. Or they could have imagination offs where each have a go at writing the script, and try to out do eachother but AJ still ends up giving Pete a lesson in writing.
John
I agree with this. The butt-plug was an unnecessary joke that didn't really fit the tone of the script, but I like the idea of the ending being the writer not having an ending.