All screenplays on the simplyscripts.com and simplyscripts.net domain are copyrighted to their respective authors. All rights reserved. This screenplaymay not be used or reproduced for any purpose including educational purposes without the expressed written permission of the author.
Procella by Froli Bazooka - Short - The tempest is here, its wrath is universally damning. Its origins are dark and mysterious. Can it be stopped? - pdf, format
I liked the fact that this piece stuck to the limited parameters very well. One room location so it's low budget. The storms are there. One of them can control it.
Decent dialogue, but teethers on melodrama in the end. Good format. Overall, an okay entry.
Certainly an interesting approach here, but it runs hot and cold.
The dialogue varies from powerful and evocative to over-the-top, and packed with exposition that works or does not work in equal measures. And it is (a bit) of a weakness that dialogue is pretty much all this story has got.
Best line: I wasn't mugging you. I was murdering you.
In the end, I liked it for trying to say something more in its pages. It is not a simple story. Flawed, but an admirable effort that I would give a B+.
Wow. The subject of God, drug addiction, sin, and telekinetic weather control. What's there not to love about this story? Brilliant, beautiful and disturbing.
I give it a 9.8
A quick and effective read. Very thought-provoking.
Micro budget: Yes - almost no budget Motel: Yes - beaten up Supernatural: Yes - storm bringer Choice: Kill to save thousands Odd characters: Maybe. Circumstances were odd. People didn't act odd, Hurricane: Procella means "storm. a tempest" in Latin. Nice.
Creative use of hurricane and supernatural requirements. I'd like to see the writer try this with action. Dialogue fav: "just another dead junkie in a motel"
This was pretty good. I couldn't really buy the fact that Spike was talking perfectly normal despite the fact that his stomach was pretty much ripped open, though. I mean, yeah, he's got some powers and all but considering the scene I think his dialogue could have been a little more fragmented and/or to the point rather than bothering to explain everything in perfect sentence structure.
Met the requirements nicely and had a powerful story to tell.
This was okay. Stuck to the requirements well but agree with Greg that Spike's dialogue didn't resemble a man who was seriously stabbed.
With this been such a heavy dialogue script, I think it could be stronger. I liked the gritty opening but then it trails into the supernatural, and although I like it, I think thats were the dialogue suffers a bit. Spike tries to kill Robert and yet he tries to help him, because he's a changed character...I don't buy it. The name is great though.
Overall, I think this is good effort and a decent idea.
Check out my scripts...if you want to, no pressure.
I thought you did well with this one. It is basically just dialogue though. If you can make it a little more interesting by adding some visually interesting things like showing emotions better, that would help a lot to enhance this script. You did follow the one-week challenge requirements.
Sorry if this was kind of short, but I did not have that many complaints about it other than what I mentioned above.
There's alot being said here and it's impressive that this was conceived in a week. Do I understand it all? No, I don't, but I think that's actually a good thing - like a movie you want to watch again, to make sure you understood everything. Will I read it again? Probably not, but that's more due to some writing choices that I personally don't like to see...
...like...
All the CAPPED words.
The variety of punctuation used
The awkward lines
But, hey, it's an OWC, so no harm, no foul.
The downside here is probably as others mentoined, there's just too much dialogue, and it gives the feeling of this being longer than it is.
Overall, I like it, though. Good job. Very unique. Some definite thouught went into this and it shows.
It was all right, I guess. The dialogue was more than I was hoping to have, but I can completely understand that because of the rules.
I agree with others that the dialogue is okay and not-so okay at times. Beyond that, there isn't a whole lot to talk about. Better than some others, but it had nothing that really grabbed me.