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SimplyScripts Screenwriting Discussion Board    Unproduced Screenplay Discussion    Short Scripts  ›  The Engine Room Moderators: bert
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  Author    The Engine Room  (currently 1330 views)
Don
Posted: February 21st, 2004, 11:10pm Report to Moderator
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So, what are you writing?

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The Engine Room by Matthew Goodwin - Short - An ambitious, out-of-the-loop film producer has one more throw of the dice for the next 'surprise, never-been-done before' hit.  Has the Guiness Book of Records been optioned yet? - html** format.


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Matt_G.
Posted: February 22nd, 2004, 2:44pm Report to Moderator
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I would love some feedback on my short, if anyone feels so inclined.  It was more an exercise in dialogue than anything else.  I wanted to illustrate how a person can completely - and unconsciously - humiliate or humble another through ill-conceived ideas and words.  More than one character in this scene is humbled by another who chooses words like battering rams.

Thanks.

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tommyd
Posted: February 23rd, 2004, 6:37am Report to Moderator
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since you wrote it as being an excercise in dialogue it worked nicely.

very good dialogue that seemed to flow from the characters mouths pretty convincingly.


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velera
Posted: February 28th, 2004, 8:54pm Report to Moderator
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Excellent dialogue. Have you tried writing a whole screenplay yet?

Rich
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Matt_G.
Posted: March 2nd, 2004, 11:54pm Report to Moderator
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Thanks for the feedback.  I haven't as yet completed a whole screenplay as I suffer from the "too many stories at once so can't stick with just one therefore nothing much gets written at all" disease. 

To be honest, I fall foul too often from poor discipline and too many distractions around me.  It's like when you were at school and you thought to yourself "I'll take this home and do it," but when you get home there are far too many distractions around. 

And before anyone says "find a quiet place," trust me, I have!  I can find distractions everywhere.  Maybe I'm just lazy.

I think that's it. 

I've put more effort into this message than I have with any real writing lately.  Frustrating and sad!

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Qhank
Posted: March 25th, 2004, 12:34am Report to Moderator
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It's very funny and dry.  I love the type of dialogue where two people are talking about two different things at the same time.  Happens to me and the little missus all the time.  Good job.
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MacDuff
Posted: March 25th, 2004, 3:42pm Report to Moderator
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Loved it.
Thought the dialogue was tight, quirky. Very dry humour (the way I like it) and very believable characters.
Good job!


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Matt_G.
Posted: March 25th, 2004, 4:22pm Report to Moderator
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Thanks for the comments, MacDuff and Qhank!  It's this sort of feedback which inspires a person to write more.

If you liked this one, perhaps you could read and comment on the other script I have on here, Acting Lessons.  It's more recent than this one, but it hasn't had as many hits or any feedback yet, which I think is important.

Cheers,
Matt
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MacDuff
Posted: March 25th, 2004, 4:47pm Report to Moderator
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Sure Matt - I'll read it when I get home from work and post my thoughts.


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mtlancas
Posted: August 30th, 2004, 9:42am Report to Moderator
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Hi. Just read Engine Room after being impressed by Acting Lessons. I actually think this is the better script although I liked both. Dialogue is spot on and reveals the characters very efficiently- something I often struggle with. I really think you should attempt a full-length screenplay  (easier said than done- I know)

keep up the good work
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nolie
Posted: September 15th, 2004, 3:17pm Report to Moderator
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Just finished reading "Acting Lessons," so I came to read this one. You're a really brilliant writer! I love the part when Cushing begins his speech about his suit and how he "only wears it to throw the nitwits down the hall praying on the next--" and Guiness cuts him off.
Anyways, it was a great script. Perfect dialogue. Easy to read. I loved it.


my heart is yours to fill or burst...
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directoboy12
Posted: September 17th, 2004, 9:00pm Report to Moderator
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We all go a little mad sometimes. Haven't you?

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After reading "Acting Lesson" and now this I believe that you are a great dialouge writer. The writting is funny, smart, and witty. I really like the conversations. I hope you can write a full script one day.


Check out my Script:

Feature:
"Candy: Inspired by the Houston Mass Murders"
Horror, Drama - 15 year old drunkard Wayne Henley gets caught up in procuring his teenage friends for a serial killing psychopath. 117 pages
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Takeshi
Posted: October 8th, 2006, 6:08am Report to Moderator
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Hey, nice work, Matthew.

I don't know if you're still around, but I read your script, so I may as well post a review.

The dialogue was slick and you did a great job of sending up a Hollywood studio type.

I particularly liked it when Cushing was asking about the forty year old actresses and I laughed out loud when Guinness said that scripts where BS.

This is a great little script and given the fact that it takes place in one location, it would be worth making a short film out of it.

Nice work.
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Alex J. Cooper
Posted: October 8th, 2006, 7:43am Report to Moderator
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Yeah great dialogue, bit of a sad but true ending.


Shorts:
I Named Him Thor
Footloose, Cut Loose
Tainted Milk
Marshmallows
Confucius & The Quest For Nessie
Wondrous Presentation
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