Hey y'all,

Just wanted to let you know that my script "The Second Draft" has been produced. I'm totally psyched about it - it's my first time.


The Second Draft-Part 1 from boostcpa26 on Vimeo.


The Second Draft- Part 2 from boostcpa26 on Vimeo.


The Second Draft-Part 3 from boostcpa26 on Vimeo.

A very talented guy named Abel Alvarado produced, edited and directed it and you can check out more of his other work here or here. Abel made some really cool additions to the story that just improved the hell out of it

Cheers
Rob

Rob this looks really nice, congrats man! some excellent shots in there!

Rob, that was brilliant. Well done.

I liked the black and white, it really suited the style of the film and worked well. The actors did a great job too. Really nice job.

Hope you are feeling a bit proud of yourself? you deserve to.

Awesomeness! Congrats, Rob! Feels really cool to hear your dialogue spoken, right?

There were some pretty good shots in there, especially the one with the basketball court as a backdrop! They looked great!

btw. is that guy who plays the stranger South African or something? I couldn't quite place his accent...

Quoted from Friendly Neighborhood Hitman That’s the way Rob writes them…no plot…no character development…just…shit.

I love that so much, but...but...

...now waitaminute...what the...?

Am I wrong, or did he completely undo the whole damn ending, which made the whole damn piece work so well?

It looks good and all, but still…I do not like that at all.  Not one bit.

Quoted from Death Monkey btw. is that guy who plays the stranger South African or something? I couldn't quite place his accent...

I was thinking the same thing, but eventually assumed that it wasn't an actual accent.  More of an acting one.

Looked put together quite well, though.  I enjoyed it.  Like Bert, I recall the ending being slightly different, but this one didn't bother me.

Nice work.

Quoted from GM I liked the black and white, it really suited the style of the film and worked well.

Yeah, shooting this black and white was such a brilliant idea. In my mind I hadn't pictured it B/W but like you said, it really suited the style of the film and story.

Quoted from Grandma Bear Why is no one making anything of mine....  :'(

They will, Pia. They will. Otherwise we'll show them why the Vikings were so feared.

Quoted from Death Monkey Feels really cool to hear your dialogue spoken, right?

It's friggin' awesome. And it's great to hear someone put a different spin on it.

Quoted from Death Monkey There were some pretty good shots in there, especially the one with the basketball court as a backdrop! They looked great!

I was wondering how Abel would pull the "running man" sequence off. That was just brilliant, I really liked that shot too.

Quoted from bert Am I wrong, or did he completely undo the whole damn ending, which made the whole damn piece work so well?

No, the ending is the same as in the script. The "suicide" scene was added by the director and I think that was a very clever move. Not only did he add a little action but he also managed to make Craig's acceptance of the situation more believable (damn, I should've thought of that  ::))

Quoted from Death Monkey btw. is that guy who plays the stranger South African or something? I couldn't quite place his accent...

Quoted from Shelton I was thinking the same thing, but eventually assumed that it wasn't an actual accent.  More of an acting one.

Will check up on that and get back to you.

Thanks to everyone.

Quoted from GM Hope you are feeling a bit proud of yourself?

Oh, I am, buddy.  :)

Cheers
Rob

Congrats Rob! Welcome to the club.

~Zack~

A dark, clever spin on the "Stranger than Fiction" premise. Totally kick ass, man.

Spoilers - I was expecting to see the hunter become the prey at the end, but not in the way you handled it. Very well done. - End spoilers.

Those who know -from the start- that the writer of this is actually called Rob, have the advantage of being able to fully appreciate your self-depreciation humour. Which added a quite interesting layer to this piece.

Just a small nitpick, I believe that the dialogue could be trimmed a bit, but overall this was a very solid piece.

Here, take the key to the exclusive bathroom for produced writers, where there are hot chicks to shake your thing for you after you´re done.  8)

Just watched this and thought it was very good.  The actors seemed okay and not too amateurish and the director seemed to know what he was doing (not sure about the screenwriter tho lol )

If anything the only complaint I had was with the music. Nothing wrong with it really but it just wasn't my kind of music. But what ya going to do, it worked for the story and that is the main thing.

Quoted from Mr.Z Here, take the key to the exclusive bathroom for produced writers, where there are hot chicks to shake your thing for you after you´re done.  8)

Where is this place?  My magical bathroom has this beast in it...

Holy shit, Mike. Pia is in your bathroom?

:K)

Quoted from sniper Holy shit, Mike. Pia is in your bathroom?

Damn.  I was really hoping the "after" picture would have slipped by undetected,

Congrats Rob. It looks good. I like the black and white and the opening is good. Has he sent it in to film festivals?

Gabe

Carefull, guys. You don't want a squad of Swedish assasins knocking at your door.  ;)

Quoted from Mr.Z Carefull, guys. You don't want a squad of Swedish assasins knocking at your door.  ;)

Yeah, cos' that would be, like, really scary  :P

And thanks for the key to the bathroom, Z.

Quoted from that thing! I'll shake you when you're done...

Looks like she'll rip it off  :o

Quoted from Grandma Bear ...a Chicago lounge singer... What I want to know is, what do I get when something of mine is produced?

I'll let you hold my microphone for a bit.

Quoted from Grandma Bear What if I shake it?

Nothing in the short term, but if you keep at it you may get some "feedback".

Quoted from Shelton Nothing in the short term, but if you keep at it you may get some "feedback".

Jeez, you didn't just say what I think you said, did you? ;)

I hate to interupt us but...

Rob,

Just watched the short and I thought he did a nice job with it.  I liked that he or you moved the dialogue off the bench.  I seemed a tad long and he probably could cut some of it but that is a nit.  The only other major crit I have about it revolves around the acting and there isn't much you can do about that.

Well done.

Hey Michael,

I can't take any credit for moving the action away from the bench, that was the director's choice and imo it was a smart move. I agree with you about the lenght of it and when Abel asked for my opinion that was the one point I mentioned. It does run a bit on the long side.

Cheers
Rob

Hey Rob

Enjoyed this man, congrats. I haven't read the script yet - maybe should have done that first - but I'll give it a read in a bit.

My favourite shot was the moon coming out, sort of like you watching over them. He says 'kid' a fair bit though don't he?

Nice job

Ste

Hey Rob,

Just got finished watching this.  It was really good, and the things that were wrong with it had nothing to do with the writing aspect of it.

Like Mcornetto, I did have a problem with the acting, especially the actor who played Craig.  He played this more like an over-the-top comedy.  For some reason, to me he seemed like a tweaked out Seinfield.  I understand that there were funny bits in this and a lot of it is tonge-in-cheek, but he was just way too out there.

The Stranger I thought did a pretty decent job.  He made errors here and there that weren't too well hid in the editing, but I think he passed for the character.

As for the music, I did like the soft piano.  That was a nice touch.  I didn't like how it went to electronica, though.  To me, that music made it seem like a techno-Snatch or 'Lock, Stock'...  something that I feel that this piece wasn't.

The directing, however, I think was very good and he definately did your original script justice.  There were some really cool shots in there.

What I like best about this is the originality.  I know somebody earlier made a reference to 'Stranger than Fiction', but this for me works on a completely different level.  And, I think that this was actually good.  'Stranger than Fiction' wasn't good.

I imagine it must be awesome to finally see the words you put on paper come alive.  To be honest, after having that experience (writing something good and having it produced well), I'm really surprised you haven't been churning out more work than you have.  I figured that'd be a lit match under the ass for any writer.  But, imagining your response already... I know, I know...  Quality, not quantity.

And now for the typo's that I found in the credits...





:-)





See ya around, Rob.  And congratulations.

Cheers.

- Mark