Tommy's Ghosts by Ron Gannon - Short, Action - A ghost from the 1940's haunts a house.  And he’s not alone. Rated R for nudity and adult language.  9 pages - pdf, format 8)

This is a pretty interesting script Ron.

SPOILERS

In the beginning I was wondering what the hell Harry Trueman had to do with it, but then when Hitler’s ghost turned up it made sense. I also enjoyed the way Tommy mocked the ghosts and gave the audience a little run down about them, whilst preparing to torch the place.

The only bit that lost me was the scene on the swings, after the baby got killed; it was unclear how long after the incident this was. For a minute I thought it must have been the next day and perhaps the baby was fine, so, yeah, it was a little confusing. Perhaps you could insert a card between those two scenes, saying three months later or something,

All in all I thought you breathed a bit of fresh air into a fairly stale genre.

Page 1 typo; A WELL DRESSED MEN etc. Should read; A WELL DRESSED MAN etc.

Chris,

Thanks for the read and review of Tommy’s Ghosts.

Originally I had two men standing in front of the desk. After I deleted one, I forgot to change men to man. Thanks for pointing that out.

It was the next day.  I deleted some dialogue about an ambulance and a police car being in front of the house the preceding night. Thanks for the super impose suggestion. I’ll give that some thought.

Thanks again.

Okay I just finished your short so here I go with the review stuff.

* SPOILERS! *

* Hitler was one of the ghosts?  lol Weird enough to be kinda cool.
* I caught one or two typos, one was like "men" instead of "man" I think.
* You had a lot of stuff happening right on top of each other.  Maybe if it were more spread out and gave the characters a chance to establish themselves it wouldn't seem like a scare a second.
* Tommy goofing on the ghosts - good stuff.
* I was lost at the first.  Who was Truman talking to?  An agent to kill the real Hitler?  :-/

Overall a fun, if odd read.

I hope this helps.