Rip and Burn by Eric Ward - Action, Thriller - From the car scene of LA, a mysterious loner dishes out bloody justice in the form of wrecked cars and burnt flesh, with the help from a sexy vixen in charge of a 50 Cal sniper rifle, against an evil the Law won't dare to touch. 69 pages - pdf, format 8)

Eric,

I took a quick peek. Your logline needs an overhaul. It's just bad.

You do have a grasp on the format, but the writing is awkward.

Quoted Text Then two heavily-worked muscle cars do burnouts side-by-side. The ensuing burnout creates a cloud of thick white smoke. A Disco Ball Light enlivens the atmosphere by coloring the burnout smoke with it�s lights. A silver-framed sunglasses wearing eccentric stands next to his custom van, bobbing to music, and in his van is the Disco Ball Light. Maverick makes his way toward a cool-looking yellow Monaco. Inside the Monaco sits in the passenger seat BLUE (Male, mid-20s, mellow, cool, handsome, etc).

"A cool-looking yellow Monaco" is a good example; How can a Monaco be anything other then cool looking? What make is it? The styling of  a 1973 model is drastically different compared to a 1978 model. Your descripton is too vague overall.

There are grammar problems. Here's a good example: "A silver-framed sunglasses wearing eccentric". This is bad grammar. So the eccentric is silver-framed? I know that's not what you meant, but that's what he is by the description you've written.

Quoted Text Suddenly Maverick spots Luna (early 20s, pretty, great legs, rich bitch personality) and is immediately smitten.

Only describe physical appearance when introducing characters, don't describe personality traits; reveal them through character interaction and dialogue.

I'm sure you have a great story to tell but unfortunately it's hard to see right now.

Best of luck with it.

Lono