Solitude by Thomas J Campbell - Short, Sci Fi, Fantasy - In the face of planetary destruction A man abandons his family to spend his last moments alone. 2 pages - pdf, format

Writer interested in feedback on this work

Well written - I liked it

You have two text lines mixed in with the subsequent action lines, I believe.

If you wanted to me to feel contempt for this man, you succeeded.

However, this is way too short. You simply relate the events. There is no emotion attached to it, no gravitas, no guilt or struggle. Why does he feel he needs to do this?

Not sure what you were trying to achieve.

What I get out of this short is that an asteroid is going to wipe out Earth, he goes to the wilderness with pills and whiskey to commit suicide.

Suz must be his wife... he has kids.

If I was him I would stay at home, get fuckered up, and screw the hell out of my wife.

Best to die with a smile on your face.

Hi Thomas,

Quoted Text A man, JOHN (32)

No real need to say a man if his name is John, don't know how many female Johns you know.

I don't get it at all. What's his motivation for going into the woods and having a potentially slow painful death? Why not spend it with his family? Is there a reason he doesn't want to?

If it's a planet killer, I imagine it would be quick and painless.

If there was a reason for him to be doing what he did it could probably be a good little short.