Terrible logline.  No title page.  First Slug is pathetic.

And then, a 6 line opening passage that's not broken up remotely correct, and reeks of pisser description.

That's already 4 strikes, so I should be out, but I only have 5 more script to read, so I'll give this my best.

Wow, the writing here is full on PISSER with mistakes galore - possibly on purpose even.  Pathetic!  No pissers allowed!!

This is just terrible and in no way meets the challenge theme or is a serious entry.  Complete waste of time.  Worst of the bunch by a long shot.

Grade - ZERO STARS

The kidnapped Italians don't act very scared, which is great if they turn out to be crazier than Harley. In which case, it would be a race to see who could kill who first. If they're not crazy, then the Italians fraternizing with this pair of nuts needs more explanation.

Maybe when he's barbecuing the Italians in the backyard, we see that there are numerous suspicious mounds scattered about the yard. All of them have flowers growing out of them. Thus they've combined their two hobbies: burying people and growing flowers.

I think I understand just what a pisser is now. So many WTF moments, I didn't even keep track. The first page started off promising and then it went right down the tubes. Sorry, not for me in the least.

Quoted from khamanna Hi, writer. So, it's a thriller, huh? The part when the Mother pulls the wrench out of her butt crack is pretty thrilling, so it might just be.

Ok, At first, you actually drew me in with the crappy business. Good ole Harley, got a laugh out of him but:

When I hit the part so well defined in the quotes above, I stopped reading.

Less is sometimes more and that was just too much.

Sandra