Hello Ste,

I wanted to say that I thought your script was not bad.

I think you should make Katie a real character and that when she does die and Loneliness returns, it would make Logan's character come full circle.  Not sure how you feel about that.

The idea where Logan tries to get away from Loneliness, finds happiness and then his life is shattered.  Loneliness is there to pick up the pieces.  

Overall it was good and quick, and you've got my vote for the monkey staying for the rewrites.

All the best.


Javier

Thanks for the read Javier.

That would be an interesting way to take this but I'm really wanting to keep the majority of the script imaginary. Maybe I'll have her really be with him but his imagination paints a different picture of her and drives her away.

I think there's a few different ways I can take this and I'll definately try your way in the experiments.

Maybe have the monkey as the only reality and Logan's a part of his imagination? haha

I'll have to take a look at one of your family guy scripts over the weekend.